hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21102 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#2960 [ + | - ] 646
<waterfire> All women are gay, or at least that's what they
tell me
#2959 [ + | - ] 806
<Entomorph> blazemore, I know you
<Entomorph> oldskewl emu guy right?
<blazemore> heh yeah
<Apoc> irc is just wierd
<Apoc> no where else can you run into old friends that you
have never met
#2958 [ + | - ] 312
<datz510> u prolly race grandmas goin tot he grocery store too
huh
<BenK> no
<BenK> I race hardcore racers
<BenK> people with tinted windows
<BenK> and 20 inch rims
<datz510> Ben.. like other hondas?
#2957 [ + | - ] 233
<trccccc> virus: go fuck a leprocohn
<brucel33t> I bet they give good head
<trccccc> maybe he will give you his bag of gold
<Reul> or what's in his sack
#2956 [ + | - ] 304
<blazemore> my chair is starting to smell bad from me farting
in it so much
<blazemore> either that or it's the underwear i've been
wearing for 4 days
#2955 [ + | - ] 52
<trccccc> I was going down on this one girl once.... and her
clit was the size of my pinkie... I was all DAMN and exscused
myself and went back down to the party
#2954 [ + | - ] 280
<dregan> EGADS THE PAIN
<dregan> THE BITING, GNAWING PAIN
<dregan> THE SEARING, UNENDING.. UN.. mmm..
#2952 [ + | - ] 283
<nstylz> i want to make a site that the people run it and then
just forget about it and watch the $ go in
<Deadbolt> sorry, we already have a slashdot
#2949 [ + | - ] 285
<al-x> pam anderson had implants
<al-x> had them taken out
<al-x> just had them put back in
<al-x> she proly has zippers
<al-x> under her arms
<al-x> or somethign
#2942 [ + | - ] 342
*** Now talking in #cars
*** Topic is 'No gay sex talk please thanks'
<spazzer> no gay sex talk eh?
<spazzer> this channel is going to be quiet then
#2941 [ + | - ] 264
<BlackDeth> the only effect cocaine really has is it makes you
want more cocaine :D
#2940 [ + | - ] 532
<T_hibiki_> you catch your lady in bed with another man what
do you do ?
<sparatik> tell him she has an STD
#2938 [ + | - ] 765
<BlackDeth> man this sucks
<BlackDeth> why is it that all drugs make you lazy and useless
<BlackDeth> they should invent one that motivates you to do
homework and shit
#2937 [ + | - ] 325
<exbawx> $465 in debt. good luck to me.
<novocain> its yer own damn fault that 1. you work at taco
bell 2. that you only work 4 hours a week
#2935 [ + | - ] 447
<Object> booya my roommate, got in a fight last week.. this
week, booya was starting a new job .. he gets in and finds out
his new boss is the guy he fought last week, we thought it was
pretty funny
#2934 [ + | - ] 1697
<Potato> I've known her for years and I've always wanted to
fuck her.
<Potato> But her last boyfriend was a 6 foot 7 black man.
<Potato> So I just don't try.
<Potato> I'm above average, but he was a giant black man.
<Potato> I mean, c'mon.
<Potato> He was like Godzilla, but black.  Like Shaftzilla.
<memo> Did he smash Japanese skyscrapers with his dong?
<Potato> Yes.
<Potato> Yes he did.
#2933 [ + | - ] 119
<eldee> welp, i got some coding to do.. smell ya later
<eldee> Aimee: for you that's a literal statement
#2931 [ + | - ] 280
<profuse> its rather good, this is the first of anything of
his that ive listened to
<profuse> heh im talkinglike im british or some shit
<al-x> hey
<al-x> americans say "rather" too
<al-x> except they say "i'd rather have a big slow car that's
flashy than a car that isn't flashy but runs better"
#2930 [ + | - ] 489
<Muskratt> How can people like you guys survive infancy
without bursting into flames from some major god (I don't care
who) 's anger?
<MightyQuinn> easy
<MightyQuinn> we carry fire extinguishers
#2929 [ + | - ] 563
<neck> btw... bought an ice cream maker today :)
<qu4ntum> dont you mean a donut maker ?
<Lord-Data> very easy to get those confused ..
<neck> oh hell yeah
<neck> oh crap... it was a donut maker
#2928 [ + | - ] 468
<Kazz> Everybody kept screeching "DON'T DO IT LOOK AT ALL
YOU'VE GOT TO LIVE FOR" and he was like "no im gona do it" and
I said "How?" and he said "Knife through the heart" and I was
like "Wicked.  Send pics."
<Sharkey> My favorite one was back in #verge years ago.
Finally after I ribbed her for about an hour she said that
she'd slashed her wrists because of me. I asked her if she was
typing with her tongue.
<Kazz> I suggested he fall on a chainsaw.  He liked the
messiness.
#2927 [ + | - ] 269
<CmnstR> so i calls it ScRnr?
<Lord-Data> CmnstR: you call it a screener
<Lord-Data> the only reason you would type ScRnr would be if
your e key wasnt working
#2925 [ + | - ] 377
<Slant> evenpar123: What's up dog, word?
<evenpar123> dog?
<evenpar123> That's my slave name.  My new name is "dogg"
#2923 [ + | - ] 429
<michael-> shut up
<michael-> i sucked a lot of cock to get where i am today
<kisama> heh
<kisama> at least you got to suck cock and not be ass raped
like the rest of us
#2922 [ + | - ] 57
<Snag> on another note
<Snag> you know any fake tan shit i can buy?
<eldee> fake tan shit?
<eldee> wtf?
<Snag> ya
<Snag> i have supah white arms
<eldee> go to a tanning booth, give the bitch 5 bux and stick
your arm in the pipe dude
#2921 [ + | - ] 483
(Fungus): idler, define " life " please :)
(Idler): Fungus: Life is the thing that grows in my fridge
(Idler): Starting to get really big now
(Idler): Might have to kill it some day
(NX): did u try to eat it?
(Idler): NX: No, that's what I should have done a long time
ago
#2916 [ + | - ] 1030
<{SaTaN}> GOD DAMN IT SUN OF A BITCH STOP CALLING ME SANTA IT
IS "SATAN!!!!!!!!!!!!"
<DaRkShaMe> hi santa
#2915 [ + | - ] 381
<EFX> What's a dikfor?
#2913 [ + | - ] 208
<Berzerker> what are you goign to pick?
<ding> HAWT PAWKETS
#2912 [ + | - ] 496
<IceWizard> What the HELL is up with these candy companies?
Little teeny bars are called 'Fun Size'.. Damn, Whats so fun
about a smaller candybar?!?
#2911 [ + | - ] 949
* Berzerker gets hungry
* Berzerker eats his e's
*** Berzerker is now known as Brzrkr
#2910 [ + | - ] 91
<Berzerker> like one time i shit on a bench in my school
playground
<Berzerker> and like it smelt so bad
<Berzerker> and i covered it with playground gravel
<Berzerker> and like when the cafeteria aid came the next day
she cleared it off with her hand
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> poop!
#2909 [ + | - ] 64
<blazemore> i saw a big crack in front of me, then this flash
of light.. after that, i can't remember anything.
#2908 [ + | - ] 351
<DEMI1999> ed's hit an all time high of un-understandability
<DEMI1999> <eDz0ph_gb> d0f eye ,ent n0am
#2907 [ + | - ] 342
<Berzerker> hey
<Berzerker> you hear about the new game they play at the white
house?
<Berzerker> swallow the leader.
#2906 [ + | - ] 264
<EFX> take a banana .. cut off the top .. squeeze the banana
out gently keeping the peel intact.. get a empty toilet paper
roll .. put the peel inside of it .. warm it up in the
microwave .. and then stick your cock in it
#2905 [ + | - ] 371
<BRASIL> IN MY COUNTRY TOO HOT TO GO OUTSIDE
<BRASIL> SO I SURF NET INSTEAD
#2904 [ + | - ] 725
<Berzerker> they gave christopher reaves a standing ovation
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> he cant even stand up
<Berzerker> so hes like
<Berzerker> wtf
#2903 [ + | - ] -1
<Berzerk0r> eD farted and it smelt like bvaD
#2902 [ + | - ] 69
<k> hm yes i believe to say d0f would be the correct way out
of this interpretation situilimintation
#2899 [ + | - ] 379
*** hypr changes topic to '.'
<LkChaCha1> Ahh. . .hypr had his period. Must be that time of
month.
#2898 [ + | - ] 78
<XxDeThxX> thats what the sperm whales do..they check out the
females then all the males rub against eachother til they
spooge
#2897 [ + | - ] -26
<Pyre> Gumby's mom is hot
#2895 [ + | - ] 369
<blazemore> RZR033DCC IS OFFERING VIRUSES INFECTED WITH WAREZ
#2893 [ + | - ] 593
<Berzerker> i shit too big
<Berzerker> i clog up the toilet without using toilet paper
<Berzerker> my parents think i use too much
<Berzerker> and im starting to get in trouble for doing it
<Berzerker> i dont wanna tell them "i shit big, sorry"
#2892 [ + | - ] 97
<FLoBBaSKo> That'd be cool if there was a hermaphrodite that
had their dick coming out of their vagina... they wouldn't be
able to walk without having an orgasm.
#2889 [ + | - ] 732
<Berzerker> Life is hard.
<Berzerker> unfortunately, you arent.
<Berzerker> call the national impotency hotline.
1-800-GET-BONE
#2888 [ + | - ] 430
<AnGeLFiRe> go screw a dog
<Pharaohe> come over to my house then babe
#2887 [ + | - ] 525
<McMoo> those presents are wrapped like motherfuckers.
<McMoo> like very thoroughly wrapped motherfuckers.
#2884 [ + | - ] 872
<Frag_> whats a good bench mark program?
<Ghaleon> Frag_: deltree /y c:\windows
<Ghaleon> the longer it takes, the slower your computer is
<Ghaleon> (ps, just a joke)
<Frag_> uh can i undo deltree?