hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21102 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#3078 [ + | - ] 731
*** Now talking in #catholic
<shervin> where can I download "Catholic School Girls Gone
Wild VII" and "Guide to Successfully Raping Nun's 2002
Edition"?
#3077 [ + | - ] 122
<ToolKid> I have a 1 inch pen0r. And that's after a 3 inch
extension
#3076 [ + | - ] 779
<foolsCAP> how much is an abortion? i want to get my
girlfriend a gift certificate for one for valentines day
#3075 [ + | - ] 349
(Arwen`) spell check on the serch engin is so nice :)
#3074 [ + | - ] 57
<Keyman> dam I just lost 128k on my upstream!
<Jumper> damn, same here, now I can only download that CD in
3.04secs instead of 3.0400000001
#3068 [ + | - ] 47
<Jizzy> geekissues<---how sad?
#3067 [ + | - ] 260
<LuMpY> i got an OC48 and 32 linux servers doing nothing on
1000Mb lan
<putnam> oh yeah bitch, well i got OC49 and 33 linux servers
doing everything on a 5000Mb lan
#3066 [ + | - ] 422
<CactusJack> thats exeactly it...
(putnam): i lip synced rubber ducky by ernie from sesame
street in literature for a project once.
(putnam): that brought the damn house down. i couldnt believe
how perverted the song is
(putnam): i danced too. and got people into it. they were
clapping.
#3065 [ + | - ] 1088
<putnam> i got a speech from my latin teacher about how in
europe its commonplace for men to cry
<putnam> and crying is so special
<putnam> i asked her if she wanted me to cry for her and she
said no, stop being a pussy this is america
#3063 [ + | - ] 1590
<Kashan> I hate it when H-manga's try to be philosophical
<dregan> Mehh.
<dregan> "As I lay there, with the cum flowing out of every
hole, my schoolgirl vagina stretched beyond its natural limit
by a twenty-limbed tentacle demon, I wondered 'What is the
stars, what is the stars?'"
#3061 [ + | - ] 473
<MadScribe> i WILL NEVER EVER live below someone again
<MadScribe> he is apparently redoing the fucking floor
<MadScribe> *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*
*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* pause
<MadScribe> *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*
*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* pause
<MadScribe> *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*
*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* pause
<MadScribe> *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG*
*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* pause
<MadScribe> for the last fucking hour
<MadScribe> geezus
<toNe> you sure he's not just fucking his wife?
#3060 [ + | - ] 277
<J0RD4N> where do they find these retards?
<reptile_> randomly picked from dalnet
#3053 [ + | - ] 384
<Boba> You know who should get in the NBA? Mini-Me.
<collusion> yeah, and he should play center right?
<Boba> No...he's obviously a power forward. Are you sure you
watch basketball?
#3052 [ + | - ] 819
<WillaCuz> shervin did u say u had a woman?
<shervin> WillaCuz: yeah but its losing pressure, i think it
has a hole or something
#3046 [ + | - ] 171
<tomg> er I have no comment on this.
<tomg> :P
<Jumper> tomg: afraid of being quoted ? :P
<tomg> no, I'm afraid my mum will find the quotes :P
#3045 [ + | - ] 665
*** beltic has joined #html
<beltic> hey folks..
<beltic> anyone know of a good php chan?
<myn> #php
<beltic> thanks.
*** beltic has left #html
#3043 [ + | - ] 166
<Jumper> there's an old saying in this part of ze world:
you're not a real geek until you've scored sex through IRC
<Jumper> irl sex, that is
<smiler> Jumper: We figured =)
<smiler> Jumper: can you even say you scored if you get
cybersex?
<smiler> Jumper: That would be a REAL geek.
<Jumper> smiler: that would just be a looser
#3041 [ + | - ] 244
<ZombiiPro> pretty please with a virgin cherry on top
#3040 [ + | - ] 241
quits SuB-RiC (M@h24-66-38-29.wp.shawcable.net) (I am short"
is Womanese for, "I am fat)
#3039 [ + | - ] 447
<MXV> can't really tell when wife is PMSing and when she is
just naturally psycho
#3038 [ + | - ] 258
<Javi> irc is like a cigarette
<Javi> you know it's bad for you
<Javi> but you just can't stop
#3029 [ + | - ] 65
<Acero> Acero = Steel
<Acero> my nick used to be Steel
<Acero> there are a load of other lamers who use steel
<BaNe> yer nick should be puddin
<BaNe> not steel
#3027 [ + | - ] 520
<@MF_Nazi> I bet Rob wants to date a girl named Rob so he can
scream his own name during sex
#3026 [ + | - ] 79
<kisama> you know what's hilarious
<kisama> leaving your fly unbuttoned
<kisama> then walking around all furtive
<DooD> ...
<kisama> hhahaha
<kisama> i did that today
<kisama> you'd think ppl would notice
<kisama> but i was in art all day
<kisama> with my zipper down
<kisama> and a long shirt
<DooD> they'd have to look at your wang area =P
<kisama> are they afraid of sensory overload or what?
#3022 [ + | - ] 305
[00:12:10] *** ApathyGod changes topic to 'What sucks about
real life is that if you walk into a sorority and type su,
nothing happens'
#3021 [ + | - ] 200
<ric> METHOD=DRINK ACTION=CHATUPUGLYWOMEN TARGET=MYBED
#3019 [ + | - ] 779
<yossarian> theres a hole in my bucket
<tomg> yossarian: did microsoft make it?
<yossarian> yes, MSBucket
<tomg> have they made a patch for it yet?
<tomg> no, they probably want you to upgrade to Bucket.NET
<yossarian> with what shall i fix it dear microsoft, dear
microsoft?
<tomg> well the CBR (common bucket runtime) will have embedded
security to prevent leaks
#3017 [ + | - ] 344
<TurboRout> i saw some of my high school friends when i got
put in rehab
#3014 [ + | - ] 488
{[FoF]}Draegos: no, I dont jerk off
{[FoF]}Draegos: i never jacked off and never will
xceptional: your nuts must be the size of bean bag chairs
#3011 [ + | - ] 231
<Viscant> cockblock (COK'blok) n. 1. to stop in the sexual
escapading by another willfully and wantonly. 2. to deflect
the cock "viscant was eyeing ricky ortiz lustily until arturo
cockblocked him"
#3010 [ + | - ] 650
<Valdrak> SuperMan is a virgin
<Wind-X> no way superman is a virgin...
<Wind-X> dude grew up on a FARM.
#3006 [ + | - ] 370
<djLiKu> 8=========D
<insanelee> wow.. . is that life size?
<djLiKu> yeah
<djLiKu> if u have a 200 inch monitor
#3004 [ + | - ] 226
<ChunLi> my friend works at a hospital and said this guy came
in with an aspargaus stuck up his ass =)
#3002 [ + | - ] 4
[16:45] <over|kill> some say the blacker the berry the sweeter
the juice, I say the darker the skin the deeper the rootz..
#3000 [ + | - ] 180
*** madwoota changes topic to 'Synoptica needs a dick slapped
against his forehead.'
<incorrect> that an offer woota?
#2999 [ + | - ] 9222
<kyourek> There was a 23% drop in temperature.
<nappyjallapy> That's almost 25%!
<kyourek> ... That was one of the most worthless comments I've
ever heard.
#2998 [ + | - ] 708
<dboo> shit...i can hear the cat masturbating again
#2995 [ + | - ] 597
<Fee> 128 megs? 1997 called, they want there memory back
#2994 [ + | - ] -5
(phibor) im writing a windows based system called NegrOS
(evulanjal) lol
(qdial) that sounds ghetto
(qdial) what will it do?
(phibor) nothing, just like true niggers.
(nexxai) HAHAHAHAHAHA
(phibor) you give it a job and it will fuck it up..then it
will smoke your weed and fuck your girlfriend too
#2993 [ + | - ] 156
<michael-> Of the city's 11,500 firefighters, 2.7 percent are
black and 3.2 percent Hispanic
<michael-> reeediculous
<maff> that's because their darker skin color attracts the
heat
#2991 [ + | - ] 264
<Lord-Data> chmod 777 is the kinda thing i do on my own
personal box when i cant be fucked figureing out what the
perm's SHOULD be
<Lord-Data> which is, sadly, most of the time
#2990 [ + | - ] 207
<dodge> i should be in bed myself ...
<dodge> oh wait, i am
#2987 [ + | - ] 229
(Matt^^^) fenrir's gf is a quad processor solaris box
#2977 [ + | - ] 174
(siege) once a s'kiddie, always a s'kiddie
(PeeDeeCee) indeed
(siege) same with alcoholism
(PeeDeeCee) same with dalnet
(siege) hahaha
#2973 [ + | - ] 472
<Xta-C> i really need a gf
<Xta-C> ROFL
<Xta-C> gf3 even
<Xta-C> but yeah, a gf would be nice
#2967 [ + | - ] 236
<DAL9000> remember the XFL?
<DAL9000> me neither
<hex86> huh?
<hex86> the women's football thing?
#2966 [ + | - ] 238
<FMJaguar> good, we don't have time for elitists here
* FMJaguar > all of you
#2965 [ + | - ] 71
*** emul8or__ (ume@ool-18be3bcc.dyn.optonline.net) has joined
#winprog
*** delete[] sets mode: +b *!*@ool-18be3bcc.dyn.optonline.net
*** emul8or__ was kicked by delete[] (banned: <emul8or__> you
cant perm ban me)
#2963 [ + | - ] 449
<MrSede> They made a movie of Phantom Of The Opera. I was like
"woah, they made a movie of Phantom Of The Opera." Then I
didn't watch it
<Geothermal> you too eh
#2962 [ + | - ] 295
[jstepka-w] it's not gay, there are several key nerve endings
in your prostate