hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21102 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#3684 [ + | - ] 129
<dodgey> my g/f somtimes talks to me in html code
<dodgey> quite cute... eheh
<dodgey> like i go to bed the other night, she sais
<dodgey> actually, what did she say
#3682 [ + | - ] 426
<Guinivere> they have cable in Montana?
<Ouroboros> Yeah, you use it for barb-wire fences.
<Ouroboros> You know, cable.
<Ouroboros> Or for pulling your truck out of the ditch or
whatever.
#3681 [ + | - ] 309
<rivvah> dude, he's from montana or some shit. 17.50 would buy
a new house
<Ouroboros> What's a house?
#3680 [ + | - ] 265
<mightyflo> i still want the milli vanilli cd
<mightyflo> the only place i've seen it is a smoky as hell
pool hall
<scummo> Dr Q's.
<scummo> I go there specifically to play that entire CD all
the time!!!
<scummo> And the best part is, all the people there never get
that I was the one who put it on
<scummo> So they always strike up conversation like "Haha.. I
wonder who the faggot who put this shit on was.."
<scummo> especially when I had the whole long-haired rocker
image
#3679 [ + | - ] 534
*** fr33b1rth sets mode: -o fr33b1rth
<fr33b1rth> shit...
<fr33b1rth> shitfuckdamn
#3677 [ + | - ] 1025
<w3nis> I remember discussing bong tactics with a friend and
drawing out plans and then we realized we had drew a pelican
#3673 [ + | - ] 460
<dregan> Shush, or I'll stab you in the groin.
<MightyQuinn> no you won't.
<MightyQuinn> MY PENIS IS FAR TOO MIGHTY TO BE STABBED!
<dregan> Would you like to test that?
<MightyQuinn> no.
<dregan> I accept it may be hard to hit first time, but I'm
willing to give it a go.
#3672 [ + | - ] 332
<blazemore> 1) he has pants listed in the arcade machine
section
<blazemore> 2) why would you buy used clothes over the
internet :/
<Slant|SCC> Let alone "techno raver DJ" pants?
<Steve-3> 9 bids so far
<Steve-3> maybe i should start selling my old boxers on ebay
<Steve-3> These boxers are in GREAT condition, with the
exception of a spot where i let go a little early
<Slant|SCC> But they're not any ordinary boxser.
<Slant|SCC> They're "techno raver DJ" boxers!
#3670 [ + | - ] 359
<Object> shutting down your computer is like putting your dog
in a cage
<Object> you just don't do that
#3668 [ + | - ] 364
<ThaDragon> money == good life == pussy + beer.
<ThaDragon> Preferrably in that order. Pussy tastes horrible
after beer.
<tenfour> eew
* ThaDragon grossed out tenfour
<tenfour> I can't stand the taste of beer
#3664 [ + | - ] 225
<mappyman> i sent off for a PAL videotape of Captain Jack
<mappyman> still in backorder
<Hiko> heh
<Hiko> how you gonna play a PAL tape?
<mightyflo> just crack it
<mightyflo> www.vhscopyworld.com
#3663 [ + | - ] 79
<TURBOMEAT> gross
<TURBOMEAT> note to self : clean george foreman grille before
making grilled cheese
<Megami> Hmmm.... I think it's time for CC again. XD
<TURBOMEAT> the bread tastes of the fat of 1000 meals
<Megami> Why the hell would you make grilled cheese on an
inclined grill in the first place? O.o;
#3662 [ + | - ] 257
<metroid23> all those dumb bots. they all sit around and make
each other feel comfortable by confirming each others'
decisions. it's like a big self-help group!
#3661 [ + | - ] 258
<Kiteless> anyways, invite only is often a good thing
<Kiteless> unless youre talking about girls of course..
<ScumDog> Kidon's giving you delusions about girls who like
games being 'hot'
<ScumDog> she's a serious rarity - remember that
<mightyflo> sell her on ebay
<Kiteless> 'hot gamer gf'
<mightyflo> LQQK!
#3660 [ + | - ] 288
<FlipTopBox> oooh!  i want a p'zone!
<mightyflo> "we tried spelling 'pizza' and 'calzone' but we
fucked up."
<FlipTopBox> i was thinking more like "we were trying to find
the most annoying name possible."
#3659 [ + | - ] 695
<Mazroth> A girl waved to me once before making out with her
boyfriend, does that count as scoring?
#3658 [ + | - ] 375
* auslandr pokes lint in the eye
<EigenLint> no poking.
* auslandr stabs lint in the eye
<auslandr> better?
#3652 [ + | - ] 566
<blazemore> one time i was camping with a bunch of friends and
me and this girl were sleeping next to each other and we were
both laying on our sides with our asses touching and i
accidentally farted
#3651 [ + | - ] 92
[illz] i could maybe play it off him like 'im just taking my
autistic friend out he's never had a drink before'
#3650 [ + | - ] 288
(@watchy): hey io
(@watchy): i am gonna put up a ebay auction
(@watchy): i'm gonna auction my sperm
(@watchy): haha
*** Quits: watchy (Excess Flood)
(@[IO]): or not
#3649 [ + | - ] 269
<PapaWo|f> any girls care to chat with 17/m/Van/Lamer/zits for
days/hideously overweight/naked right at this moment spanking
off to animal porn? msg me
#3647 [ + | - ] 897
*** Now talking in #funadultchat
<Megumi> i am ready to receive my fun
#3646 [ + | - ] 364
<WhitePony> I want to upgrade my t3 connection to a cable
modem, where do i download the patch?
#3638 [ + | - ] 321
<CoMBo> so for job titles, i should put Wholesale Distributor,
Bookkeeping and ...what goes here
<jube> Village Idiot
#3636 [ + | - ] 140
<kung_fu_mike> its not a fast rmix when all you did was speed
up the bit rate
<kung_fu_mike> oh and degrade the quality
#3635 [ + | - ] 1069
<L0ne_W0lf> I saw a lady at work today putting a credit card
into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. I
inquired as to what she was doing and she said she was
shopping on the Internet, and they asked for a credit card
number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."
#3634 [ + | - ] 250
<tyne> my life consists of 2 things
<tyne> music
<tyne> and debt
#3632 [ + | - ] 172
<tsui-ji> gyl: go into #asian and tell em you are white, have
muscles and drive a nice car and mad chicks will msg you
#3630 [ + | - ] 6839
<blazemore> omg i love this song
<blazemore> Now playing: Unknown Artist - Track 2 @ 128 Kbps.
(0:47/3:24)
<Javi> blazemore:  yeah, that's a bad ass song
#3627 [ + | - ] 120
<Phil> i always have fun when 11 inches is involved
#3625 [ + | - ] 328
<nakke> !dictionary fellatio
<FillyJonk>  2 entries found for fellatio.
<FillyJonk>  fel-la-ti-o (f-l, -sh, f-) n. Oral stimulation of
the penis. [New Latin, from Latin felltus, past participle of
fellre, to suck. See dh(i)- in Indo-European Roots.]
<JibberJim> So billions is spent on making it possible for
people to "chat" across the world, and access dictionary's and
what do you do? - look up dirty words...
#3623 [ + | - ] 183
<fai|ure> pearl must have some cavern pussy if she's wanting
it in the ass everytime
<pearl> i didnt say everytime
<pearl> occasionally is nice :)
<pearl> jd has the nicest thing to say about me usually
<fai|ure> i'm that sensitive type of guy
<fai|ure> ya' know what i'm sayin'
<Ginger> cavernous is not good
<Ginger> cept
<Ginger> for the esophageal capacity
#3622 [ + | - ] 7
<shaun|bbl> I've been smokin my cats shit recently, once you
get over the bad taste, it actually fucks you up good....:P
#3621 [ + | - ] 297
<djcrom> its so hard to create a build in an electro song
without any percussion
<noj> no it isn't
<noj> you puss
<djcrom> ok let me rephrase
<djcrom> its so hard to create a build in an electro song
without any percussion and make it not sound gay
#3620 [ + | - ] 221
<meohmy> at the end of the day its smokers that keep the
hospitals running
#3619 [ + | - ] 453
<FreshBrew> BEAT MY CHILDREN
<kolby> You take that B off and I won't even charge ya.
#3618 [ + | - ] 573
<establish> 16/f/virgin/36c/firmtits/5'9/125 pounds/I like
guys who are short, overweight, not good looking, and who are
really into computers and video games/plus I have genital
warts
#3616 [ + | - ] 621
<azmaveth> man u know that is funny as shit 127.0.0.1 is my
school ip
#3615 [ + | - ] 523
<DeathFist> hey, can u guys stop talking about racism and
shit...its getting old...if you dont like it, then you dont
have to own slaves, its as easy as that...
#3614 [ + | - ] 61
<Waters> I practice safe sex
<Waters> I masterbate with a condom on
#3613 [ + | - ] 496
<SinbadTheSailor> hi hedge...are you on turps?
<Hedge> quite sober actually
<sTar69> sober like, just jammed my penis in the door kinda
sober?
<Hedge> sober like i just got caught shoplifting a dildo kinda
sober
<sTar69> oh THAT kind of sober ;)
<sTar69> i mean err what are you talking about?
#3611 [ + | - ] 284
<sAmEeLl> i smoke dunhills
<aNuBiS-> i assume thats #bearcave lingo for cock
#3610 [ + | - ] 274
<sAmEeLl> canada`s fbi is called RCMP
<sAmEeLl> sounds like a dos attack
#3604 [ + | - ] 390
(snpr^): 1337 = l33t = leet = elite = ghey
#3602 [ + | - ] 508
<Baby-d> I set up a shoutcast last night while I was pretty
wasted, it's fuckin tight though
<SilverJag> I guess
<Baby-d> you guess!?!
<Baby-d> show some more enthusiasim!
<Baby-d> :)
<SilverJag> I cant I have diahreaa
#3600 [ + | - ] 278
<BombScare> hmmm...choices choices, either get dressed and go
get lunch, or sit here and wait for dinner
<BombScare> damn im lazy
#3599 [ + | - ] 315
<xeiro> O_6: what does updating your kernel actaully do
<O_6> xeiro, gets me the chicks
#3597 [ + | - ] 281
<Amanda> Uncle Bud's Catfish is a PRODUCT OF CORPORATE
MONOPOLIES ATTEMPTING TO STEAL OUR CATFISH TRADITION
<Amanda> AND CAPITALIZE ON IT WHILE LOSING THE TRUE VALUE OF
AND LOVE FOR THE FISH
<kisama_> alright
<kisama_> so you're against christmas presents too?
#3594 [ + | - ] 301
<mightyflo> they keep all interesting stuff from entering the
country i live in
<mightyflo> and at the same time, flood it with total crap
<Slant> mightyflo: It's a conspiracy to make us stupid.
<Reo> and it's too late for many of us
#3591 [ + | - ] 308
<Slant> ....
<FutabaAoi> i see your ... and raise you ..
<FutabaAoi> !
<Slant> four baby.
* Slant shoots FutabaAoi for cheating at the '.' table.