hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21103 Approved Quotes | 2 in Moderation Queue
#22090 [ + | - ] 363
<TrutHurts> o____o: Christ died for all and one day you will
acknowledge this fact
<wired> ORRRR you will die and be dead and you'll wish you
didnt spend all your time in an IRC channel preaching
#22089 [ + | - ] 406
<lavhoes> fuck me in the Ozarks...
<lavhoes> i was whacking off to this hot naked Japanese chick.
<lavhoes> and it's actually a guy.
<lavhoes> stupid How to Draw Manga books.
#22088 [ + | - ] 0
<Glitch> i need to disconnect soon anyway
<Glitch> so bye for now
<MK> bye
<MK> Live and Learn!
<Glitch> and then get luvs?
#22085 [ + | - ] 557
Captain: well that is half true, the environment is a problem,
and recycling does help but so does killing fascists yeah
Captain: so i say why stop at one
Captain: do both
panckreous: but killing fascists gets you arrested for....
whats the charge called
panckreous: oh ya
panckreous: assassinating the president
#22082 [ + | - ] 369
2:49°am -(Nova`)- I'd like to cover your soft milky breasts
with chocolate syrup and make a trail that goes down to
between your legs. Then Ill slowly start licking up every
drop.
2:49°am -(Nova`)- err
2:49°am -(Nova`)- SHIT!
2:49°am -(Nova`)- wrong chan
2:49°am -(Nova`)- sry
#22076 [ + | - ] 180
<Capt_A> dude lol
<Capt_A> i got an email from a goverment agent
<[OKW]BlueDevil> lol
<[101st]Nutted> cool
<Capt_A> i think they got the wrong address
<Capt_A> first line is "REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE STRICTLY
CONFIDENTIAL"
<[101st]Nutted> e-mail him back and say "i know who really
killed kenedey"
<Capt_A> lol
#22068 [ + | - ] 263
<Mephistol> irn
<Mephistol> burn in hell
<Mephistol> i went to http://legionofgimps.apt103.net/images/
<Mephistol> and my mom came in
<Mephistol> and it had 'GAY PORN GAY PORN' etc all over the
screen
<Mephistol> its not a problem, if your parents dont think
you're gay
<Mephistol> my parents think i'm gay
<Mephistol> and i imagine this didn't help
<irn> ahahah
#22064 [ + | - ] 24
<Timexy> because of some fools, we are seeing what to do
<Timexy> only for cause that we are Brazilian we are
indiscriminate --'
<Timexy> why they don't make flood in the #services for
exemple
#22061 [ + | - ] 195
<bunch> themole nslookup cdecommunications.com.au
<themole> I can't find that machine name
<cinnabar> themole, look up mydress.com
*** Signoff: themole (Read error to themole: Connection reset
by peer)
<cinnabar> he must not have liked what he saw.
#22058 [ + | - ] 627
<mike> i'm not afraid of heights.. i could look up at them all
day
<mike> it's depths that get to me
#22046 [ + | - ] 97
[4:02pm] <HandofErebus> i wish i could hit Edit>undo witha lot
of things
[4:02pm] <HandofErebus> like when i was in on my mom nekid
[4:02pm] <HandofErebus> if only that damn edit>undo was right
there
#22044 [ + | - ] 207
<agu> TETRIS FOR XBOX?!?!? - that should really push xbox to
the limit ;)
#22040 [ + | - ] 173
<isajeep> dan what rules got changed this year in the nba
<isajeep> I know refs can now use replays, but what else?
<NickBlasta> no white people
<isajeep> no nick
<isajeep> they're trying to get rid of that rule
#22036 [ + | - ] 190
(cowboy) LOL
(cowboy) THat was fuckin' funny
(cowboy) rec director at a park calls me up
(cowboy) wants to knwo how to fix something on his web page
(cowboy) I tell him it can't do what he wants it to do
(cowboy) he asks why
(cowboy) I explain
(cowboy) He comes back with, "Well I wonder what moron
designed it like that. That's stupid!"
(cowboy) I pause a moment
(cowboy) Well, actually, I was the one who designed it like
that.
(tobyl) lol
(cowboy) Oh, uh, err, uhm, ahhh, eeee, oooo, hrm, well,
uhhhhhhh
#22035 [ + | - ] -94
<BeavisNuke>  I keep all my semen in a plastic milk gallon jug
and spread it on my face every morning.
#22032 [ + | - ] 36
<RushMore> hmmm, if you got a knife and cut it off, would it
gush out?
<BadCaleb> i figured siphoning a cow would be a good idea
<Chikster> Rush, it would bleed
<Chikster> The possibility of milk is there though.
<Chikster> Caleb, like a tube
<RushMore> Well then just sell your STRAWBERRY MILKSHAKE
#22017 [ + | - ] 73
<LordOphidian> it all comes back to the manboobs
<LordOphidian> the circle of life
<cevik> that's because the manboobs are so large they create
their own gravity
<RedVoop> The circle of boob.  It consumes us all.  As we find
our hate...  on the nip all-dribbling...  o/~
<Selby> a dripping nipple... now we have truly come to nirvana
in this conversation
<LordOphidian> yes we have
<Selby> I am at peace
#22010 [ + | - ] 175
(cowboy) my dad's bullish on booty
(cowboy) buy high
(cowboy) sell sober
#22009 [ + | - ] 159
(EvilJorge) I'd go see Halloween: Resurrection were it not for
the fact that Reign of Fire opens that weekend.
(Fetch) EvilJorge: so see both
(Fetch) why do you people make these self-limiting choices in
movie entertainment?
(Sancho) we don't
(Sancho) the key word is "entertainment"
(IDK) I'd get my toenails pulled out, but I have to get bamboo
shoots stuck under them that weekend.
#22007 [ + | - ] 714
<DTails> "i see disconnected people"
#22004 [ + | - ] 120
(niles) just uncomment #UseBlackMarketBabySales yes in /etc/
ssh/sshd_config
#22003 [ + | - ] 146
* LuftHans repeats himself, but it's all verizon's fault :)
(FuckVrzn) Anyway, llama, as I was about to say before Verizon
fucked me without so much as the hint of a kiss, . . .
#22000 [ + | - ] 371
<PoisonPen> Ayn Rand is the curdled remains of a black,
bitter, shrivelled apple from the tree of hypocrisy growing
under the outhouse in the deepest pit of Hell.  She couldn't
grope her way out of her own rectum with a flashlight and a
copy of Gray's Anatomy.  Her entire rancid philosophy could
have been killed if anyone had been brave or desperate enough
to stick their penis into that frigid arctic pucker of her
twat.
#21999 [ + | - ] 1006
(Ebony) There is a cat sitting on my foot.
(IDK) You kids and your jive talk.
#21998 [ + | - ] 185
(drauku) use Slut::Redhead; require rope;
(drauku) if (@ARGV > 1) { require gag;}
#21996 [ + | - ] 86
<niles> when it comes to women
<niles> only one thing should be in latex
<niles> my prosthetic leg
#21993 [ + | - ] 200
(ennui_) heh
(ennui_) some hophead in that channel was relating his
opium-induced dreams
(ennui_) Freud would have had a field day
(Ubu) was mom in them?
(ennui_) let's just say I hope his mother has the good sense
not to hug him for too long at a time
#21985 [ + | - ] 1360
(kitten) One time, a friend and I were attempting to install a
CD burner in his machine.
(kitten) The intstructions were translated from Japanese to
English - not too bad a job, either.
(kitten) However, occasionally, they will come across a word
that simply does not translate, so they will use the phoenetic
Japanese.
(kitten) So we wound up with, you click here, you run this,
you do that, ho-shin-kai, you remove the disk..
(kitten) Took it to a friend's father who speaks passable
Japanese - he said "I think it means something like, 'to
breathe the mystic spirit of the dark dragon'."
(kitten) What that has to do with CD burners, I couldn't tell
you.
(kitten) But anyway.
(kitten) I believe that 'zig' is akin to this phenomenon.
#21983 [ + | - ] 392
(tobyl) It's damn hard to schedule these things, and we're
hitting major plot.
(tobyl) Not to mention my character just went up two levels.
(Fetch) wow
(Fetch) what'd you kill?
(Sancho) the DM
#21981 [ + | - ] 964
(lupin) yeah
(lupin) I'm pissed
(lupin) I went to Wal Mart and they stopped me because I had a
backpack
(lupin) and they said "We'll have to hold that for you because
of recent events"
(lupin) and I said "Listen, if I were a terrorist, I think I'd
pick a better place to bomb or infect than a backwater
WalMart.  I'd at least go hit the Super Wal Mart in Bryan
because I could go get McDonalds on the way to blowing it up."
(lupin) and they let me keep my bag
#21980 [ + | - ] 148
<Zenith`> he went all "want a nut"
<Zenith`> and he was like "sure"
<Zenith`> and one thing lead to another, and now kort has anal
warts
#21971 [ + | - ] 57
<Lurking-Neko-Saist> I hate having Sex with peer, she makes
feel so disconnected
#21968 [ + | - ] 129
<Emilia> i didn't think i was going to do better than the 100
gallons of bean dip for the prison
<Skiltron> man, you never get good bean dip when you buy by
the gallon
<darker> I bet it makes good spackle though
<Skiltron> it spackles your intestines closed
#21965 [ + | - ] 242
<Midvalley> Kinjin-Zero: mod your rio to add a wireless nic
<Kinjin-Zero> (Midvalley): I could... using wi-fi, nice 54mbit
connection
<Kinjin-Zero> (Midvalley): but, it'd be no use with it in the
car, and me upstairs
<Kinjin-Zero> (Midvalley): easier to just plug it in on my
desk
<Midvalley> technology isn't about making our lives "easier"
<Midvalley> it's about bragging rights
#21948 [ + | - ] 179
<Frankie> hmm, ive got a sky channel in my room and im
watching my dad trying to get porn on it downstairs
#21947 [ + | - ] 795
<SONIA420> DO U KNOW HOW TO HACK HOTMAIL ACAOUNTS
<COLON_OPENBRACKET_OPENBRACKET> NO.
<COLON_OPENBRACKET_OPENBRACKET> AND ALTHOUGH THIS MAY APPEAR
TO BE A NON-SEQUITUR
<COLON_OPENBRACKET_OPENBRACKET> I FUCKED YOUR MUM.
#21922 [ + | - ] 850
<ws\thr> (I OWN YOU: A polite way of reminding someone that
you killed them. Typically this is replied to with "FUCKING
CAMPING WHORE" which means "Well done" <
#21918 [ + | - ] 655
<Funk> I think the puppet on the left supports my views. No, I
think the puppet on the right supports my views the best. Hey,
they're both held by the same man! GO BACK TO SLEEP AMERICA,
YOUR GOVERNMENT IS IN CONTROL
<craNKGod> WE NEED TO REVOLT
<Funk> Trust me, you Americans are revolting enough
#21915 [ + | - ] 363
<@Cain> i
<@Cain> am
<@Cain> ALIVE
<@Cain> yes iam
<@Cain> but no sleep
<@Cain> in days
<@Cain> makes me sad
<@Cain> and not here
*** Cain has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<@Domino_> was that a poem?
<@Domino_> cuz i hate drive-by prose :\
#21910 [ + | - ] 174
tigremaitre: using the 5 dollar colledge works ..  :)
tigremaitre: err wrods :)
tigremaitre: dammit
tigremaitre: words even
workfox137: and hopefully a $15 spell checker
#21908 [ + | - ] 38
<+LC-Slayer[FS]> can i have ops in here soon
<@SkyHawk> prolly not, we need some pe0ns
#21900 [ + | - ] 187
<jon_> fear my house
<jon_> http://www.multimap.com/map/photo.cgi?client=europe&
scale=1000&X=507550&Y=171600&width=700&height=410&gride=507564
&gridn=171624
<mike> did you need planning permission for the red circle?
#21899 [ + | - ] 218
<MrSatan> gordon>you thecms "logo2 that you drew that gets
used on everything?
<gordon> eh?!
<ManInBlac> <MrSatan> gordon> you know the CMS "logo" that you
drew, that gets used on everything?
<ManInBlac> got to love the MrSatan -> English translator on
AltaVista
#21898 [ + | - ] 1015
<alisdair> context, boy.
<sev> and his trusty sidekick: punctuation, man
#21897 [ + | - ] 26
* SiaNz^^ sits on ele, "Can you smellllll what my ass is
exhaling"
<ele> the smell from The Rock's cooking doesn't differ much
anyway
<bubu> LoL
#21896 [ + | - ] 308
<PetrDoubt> I think knowing what you're talking about on IRC
violates the RFC
#21894 [ + | - ] 936
<omnius> omnius > join(#www(users()))
<RoBorg> omnius == "dork"
<omnius> omnius == "genius"
<omnius> if (RoBorg() == "omnius is a genius"){RoBorg ==
true;}elseif(RoBorg() == "omnius is a dork"){RoBorg ==
banned;}else{RoBorg == "dork";}
<RoBorg> if(omnius.ban("RoBorg")) {RoBorg.violence = 100;
RoBorg.rampage(); setTimeout("RoBorg.alive=false;", 360000);}
<omnius> omnius(RoBorg -> omnius.string = "omnius is a
genius");
<RoBorg> omnius >> recycle bin;
<omnius> omnius -> undelete(); omnius -> deltree("c:\RoBorg");
<RoBorg> brain://omnius/ == 404
<RoBorg> omnius.split(); omnius.slice(); omnius.explode()
<omnius> $salt = guid(); RoBorg = crypt("RoBorg",$salt);
<RoBorg> DELETE * FROM existance WHERE name='omnius';
<omnius> RoBorg = broken;
<RoBorg> with(omnius){break;}
#21892 [ + | - ] 258
<|grinch|> Jesus may be able to heal the sick and bring the
dead back to life, but he can't do shit for low fps
#21889 [ + | - ] 232
<SimonBob> A friend of mine was the games monitor for a linux/
windows hybrid comp at school
<SimonBob> He was in charge of deleting games
<SimonBob> And he was like "Linux? That game isn't fun"
#21888 [ + | - ] 218
Louis^ s/n: H6TWQ-TQQM8-HXJYG-D69F7-R84VM
Kick: mrfrost has kicked Louis^ (¤Çhanne£ Mâstêr¤ NO CAPS
¤Auto Kick¤ 1 minute)