hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21117 Approved Quotes | 3 in Moderation Queue
#58092 [ + | - ] 232
<Carlo> hand me the url
<S^^> it's in norwegian
<Carlo> so am I
#58091 [ + | - ] 220
<WimpBastard> so tired
<WimpBastard> 3am
<Buchwald> it's only 11am.  you should be wide awake
<WimpBastard> ...
<WimpBastard> wtf
<Buchwald> dude, i live in america.  our time is the correct
time.
<Buchwald> therefore, you should be awake
<WimpBastard> >:|
#58080 [ + | - ] 245
<jalist> im giving lin what i always give her
<jalist> my knob with a ribbon round it
<jalist> maybe one day she'll actually want it
<kuhndog> kind of a small gift dont ya think jalist?
#58078 [ + | - ] 253
<Danae> From the viewpoint of an uncorrupted Christian guy,
what would candles mean?
<paranoid> He wants sex.
<Iggles> sex.
<Danae> Danae will devirginized once married.
<paranoid> Devirginized? By the Devirginizer?
<paranoid> I don't know how you "pure" and "uncorrupt" people
work, he could be giving you candles to justify his guilt of
fantasizing about you when he beats off all his curbed
christian rage into a sweatsock late at night.
#58077 [ + | - ] 182
<@Zeth> SLing: Will you take 3 years, $2.5 million with a
$500,000 signing bonus?
<@SLing> Dude, for that much money I'd eat poop for a living
#58074 [ + | - ] -53
<zAim\brb> let webcam chat
<PriMa^BeLLa> let me put on sum makeup...
<PriMa^BeLLa> bfrb
<PriMa^BeLLa> brb^
#58073 [ + | - ] 215
<Nookadum> and yet I have NO spelling erros
#58067 [ + | - ] 152
<ace> type //run c:\con\con
*** voonilla (gsfgdg@202.76.41.19503) Quit (Read error to
voonilla: Connection reset by peer)
*** voonilla (gsfgdg@202.76.41.10540) has joined #3GIMPS
<voonilla> fark yew
<voonilla> i had to like pull my computer out of the wall
<voonilla> coz this fatal action thing wouldnt go away
<voonilla> and my computer wont turn off if u push  the button
<voonilla> coz if u shut it down it turns off by itself and
shit
<voonilla> and so I HAD TO PULL IT OUT OF THE FUCKING WALL
<voonilla> AND ITS ALL UR FUCKING FAULT
#58051 [ + | - ] 153
<Maltagal> hi
<Ace> sup
<Maltagal> r u over 40
<Ace> haha no
<Maltagal> well i was going to see what u r like b/c my mum is
single
#58045 [ + | - ] 1
<Mr^Bobo> i got a hard on today gettin a haircut,,,oriental
bitch
#58033 [ + | - ] 2
<PSIKAR> !sniper.tx.us.dal.net *** Looking up your
nationality...
<PSIKAR> !sniper.tx.us.dal.net *** Checking Country
<PSIKAR> !sniper.tx.us.dal.net *** Found your race
<PSIKAR> !sniper.tx.us.dal.net *** ERR YOU = DISGUSTING SLAV
<PSIKAR> Closing Link: 0.0.0.0 (Sorry, AUSTRALIA is full - try
later)
#58032 [ + | - ] 684
<Krasny> I have a bet with a friend he claims Sydney is not
the capitol of Australia LOL
<PsychoFreak> Uhhh
<BasTyra> HAHAHAHAHA
<PsychoFreak> Sydney isn't the capital of Australia
<PsychoFreak> you're fucked
<BasTyra> HAHAHAHAHA
#58031 [ + | - ] -60
<ras> i wish you could get a filter on irc to keep ethnics
from messaging me
#57942 [ + | - ] 286
<SnowSpectre> good lord... I search for "dos 5" on winmx and
this turns up
<Bullet> ?
<SnowSpectre> 5 young student girls fucked by 2 gym teachers
(Lolita Teen Preteen Porn Rape Sex Nude) QWER(1).mpg
<Bullet> Lovely. lol
<SnowSpectre> and two more ~1GB porn movies
<Bullet> damn.
<SnowSpectre> and they're all chicks. come on, if you're going
to return porn when I search for old versions of dos, at least
tailor it to my needs
<Tobisaurus> umm...
<SnowSpectre> something like "hunky british sys admin flames
stupid newbies"
<Bullet> lol
* Tobisaurus smirks
#57934 [ + | - ] -86
(dosdemon)  when you go to the tournament ask around,
everybody has like insane shit to trade
(dosdemon)  cards I never fucking heard of
(coderage)  you see any strong black there
(dosdemon)  yea there were these negroes playing yu-gi-oh that
looked pretty scary
(dosdemon)  make good workers if ya train em right
(coderage)  yeah but i dont have any fried chicken mana
#57933 [ + | - ] 178
<SantaClaus> Santa on @#gaysouthcoast
<SantaClaus> spreading white christmas in all the wrong places
#57928 [ + | - ] 225
<[5e]-j4yj0hn> I just dont have that much maney i can spend
<[5e]-j4yj0hn> Its all tied up in other things
<[5e]-One> like playboy mags and condoms
<[5e]-j4yj0hn> no, i have kazaa and socks
#57925 [ + | - ] 211
<Slime> Smearing your weiner in dog food and going over to Rex
does not count as losing your virginity
<Slime> Trust me, I should know
<Slime> You should have seen the faces at the hospital when I
asked where the "Ward for People Who Have Had Their Penises
Chewed On By Dogs"
#57916 [ + | - ] 286
<do0rkn0b> i wanna learn c++ but i am fat
<Tomato> if anything fat helps you learn c++
<Loco-san> cause you cant move from your chair
#57829 [ + | - ] 1713
<PigsCantFly> SO MY MUM WAS LIKE "CLEAN YOUR ROOM" AND IM LIKE
"NO WAY FACIST" IM THE PUNKEST
<@K0ffing> THEN I SAID I'M 12 NOW MUM I CAN STAY OUT AS LONG
AS I LIKE AND SHE SAID GO TO YOUR ROOM SO I STABBED HER WITH
MY LINKIN PARK PEN
<PigsCantFly> D00D MY MUM SAID SHE DOESNT WANT ME SKATING IN
THE HOUSE BUT I WAS LIKE NO WAY HITLER AND I KICK-FLIPPED TO
INDY GRIND ON THE CAT
#57823 [ + | - ] 413
<DrT> i was on that cruise once.  got really drunk and fucked
mini mouse
<katlizy> mini mouse?
<katlizy> is that not just a little kinky?
<DrT> freaked me out when the fake head came off.  turned out
to be a really nice guy though
#57810 [ + | - ] 691
<Volt9000> 8===D     O:
<Volt9000> 8===D   O:
<Volt9000> 8===D O:
<Volt9000> 8===DO:
<Volt9000> 8==):
<Volt9000> 8=):
<Volt9000> 8==):
<Volt9000> 8=):
<Volt9000> 8==):
<Volt9000> 8=):
<Volt9000> 8==DO:
<Volt9000> 8==D~O:
<Volt9000> 8==D~~O:
#57804 [ + | - ] 834
<OmkAR> weeeeeee
<OmkAR`> they should have a tv show, where ppl go from cable
back to dialup for like a month
<OmkAR`> and they film it
<OmkAR`> like survival
<Spiffeh> rofl
<@q-ReZ> lol
<@d-_-b> haha
#57799 [ + | - ] 655
<@newt0r> thank god, im atheist
#57779 [ + | - ] 213
<Lint> too bad the onion wont be allowed to print under
martial law.
<Spam_Man> is that where ninjas patrol the streets?
#57753 [ + | - ] 215
< peter> alanis morrisette is a prime example of why horses
shouldn't be allowed to sing.
#57733 [ + | - ] -7
<Locke> that reminds me of my orange shirt thingy
<Locke> (its not actually orange mind you)
<Locke> its from their stupid campign for sms messages
<kailus> oh ok
<Locke> it says "r u ok?"
<Locke> and when you turn it inside out it says "i feel gr8!"
<Locke> and im just dying to write "OMG LOL!!!!" on it
<Locke> but the ink will wash off :/
<kailus> hehe awww :\
#57652 [ + | - ] -15
<MAWKS> i aint a fag
<MAWKS> but ill suck a fags dick
#57644 [ + | - ] 234
<iaruj> some idiot keeps unplugging lan cable
<seniaguol> is his name...
<seniagoul> whatever your name is?
#57631 [ + | - ] 67
< dai> my knowledge of c/c++ is comparable to my knowledge of
women
< Weeble> dai: got a null pointer huh?
< pairo> You can always read books about C.
< shiwan> dai: that doesn't say very much. :P
< dai> shiwan: you're a cruel one
#57603 [ + | - ] 15
<kisama> !speedtest
<orge> computer speed is 1125Mhz
<claws03> lurking at 1364Mhz
<SantaJes> s00p3r 4thl0n runn1ng 4t 1915Mhz
<kisama> ticks: 148mhz
<kisama> yeah.
<kisama> fear me motherfuckers
<orge> huh?
<orge> ticks?
<orge> i dont know whats lamer ticks or that 148 mhz
#57596 [ + | - ] 353
<apoc> my girlfriend called me a fag, jokingly.
<apoc> i think jokingly
#57565 [ + | - ] 73
<Nephilim> No, I'm going out on a date with a girl that's had
a thing for me since high school
<Nephilim> And... she gives head!!!!!!!!!!
<+jdp> sooo
<+jdp> she will be repulsed at the sight of you now? ^_^
<Nephilim> ...
<+jdp> j/k good luck!!!
<Nephilim> Damnit
#57542 [ + | - ] 396
<santa-tim> cause the photo CRIED OUT TO BE HAXORED
<santa-tim> it said
<santa-tim> PHOTOSHOP A DICK IN HERE, IT WILL BE FUNNY
#57535 [ + | - ] 528
<Al> arabs can't spell so we have to spell for them
<Al> that's why it's "Koran"
<Kurt> short for Korean
<Lloyddy> i thought ^_^ was short for korean
<jre> No, kek is
<Alien> huk of the ke
<Lloyddy> so is keke short for a jolly korean?
<jre> A kek is one unit of kekeke
<jre> THis throws people because of the extra letter
<Alien> keks bind together via k-ration-synthesis, where each
unit sheds one k to form a long chain of kekekeks
<Kurt> FREAKIN NERD
<Alien> They're what we in the business call kekides
*Kurt spanks Alien with moon rocks
<jre> The extra Ks then bind to form the atmosphere of the
Zerg homeworld
<jre> Koreans are to the Zerg homeworld what trees are to
Earth
<jre> Coincidentally enough, when Zergs respirate, they take
in Ks and breathe out chop suey
<Alien> When the polykekide chain is broken the free ks are
broken to be used for klysis, rendering the Zerg atmosphere a
vacuum.
<jre> LIAR
#57532 [ + | - ] 549
<Scott> I thought they were all saying "Hi, Hitler!" Makes
sense, since they're waving...
#57515 [ + | - ] 743
<gazzy> fucken dammit u know it's a bad sign when you wake up
and "I R 1337" is written on ur penis :/
#57443 [ + | - ] 104
<Yaleman> omg.. you should see a netsplit / join on a warez
channel with over 3000 people in it... intense
<Yaleman> OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
<Yaleman> it's like a rollercoaster ride man
#57411 [ + | - ] 273
<oblique> i dated a canadian once
<Znutar> Did you get a refund?
#57407 [ + | - ] -31
mrdanny: I WANT TO SIT ON A WHITE ICE CREAM CONE
amIbuG: ur ass might get numb
#57374 [ + | - ] 86
<Phobius> I fear nobody
*** Phobius (anthony@phobius.support.gamesnet) Quit (G-lined
(G-line requested by Jaden.))
#57326 [ + | - ] 240
<hitman> and
<hitman> UNLIKE RageFury...
<hitman> I do do guys.
<hitman> er
<hitman> don't
<hitman> heh
<hitman> man
<ambrosia> lol
<hitman> that was a bad typo
* ambrosia pages dr. freud
#57314 [ + | - ] 35
* billh doing a survey of points in the Linux kernel where
mutex replacement would increase preemption and therefore
reduce latency for hard RT useage.
<sateh> bill
<sateh> there are too many words in that sentence
<sateh> zzzzzzzzzzz
<sateh>  http://www.wegenermedia.com/
<sateh> ibok spare parts!
<sateh> wheee!
<Feanor> hmm
<Feanor> sateh's drunk :)
#57198 [ + | - ] 384
<ecs> i heard ass and i came as fast as i could
<ecs> oh man...
<ecs> i just realized how terrible that sounded
#57174 [ + | - ] 783
<@Lujan> yet because more and more ppl are getting bigger tvs,
and more computers, air con etc
<@Lujan> last house I was in was so old it had 10amps for the
whole fucking house
<@Lujan> put some toast in the toaster and the computer
rebooted
<Durus> hahahaha lujan.  that's some funny shit
<@Lujan> Durus: no its not. I am the only person on the planet
who had to run his toaster of his UPS
#57173 [ + | - ] 1012
<fustard> one time the band teacher introduced a jazz song
with "the negroid population enjoys this piece"
<fustard> there were a bunch of black kids sitting in front of
me
<fustard> there was like a collective "what da fuck"
#57172 [ + | - ] 221
danamania: wtf... I search on altavista for my page
danamania: and an ad at the bottom goes:
danamania: Find danamania here! www.ebay.com.au - New & second
hand!
danamania: I can get a whole new me!
Vash: or a slighty used one, with a few dents
#57171 [ + | - ] 737
<SMW> howdy Ian
<SMW> how you doin tonight?
<Ian_Sharpe> same as always
<Ian_Sharpe> still smoking
<Ian_Sharpe> drinking too
<Protector> Seems you have something against internal organs
that begin with the letter "L"
#57170 [ + | - ] 101
<jayscrib> I'm hosting a few websites, how can I enable people
to connect and edit their sites? FTP is a no-go, and telnet
wont work will it? The server is a win98 box (and a lil note:
I have a router to go through)
<LilWashu> youre hosting websites for people on a win98
machine?
<LilWashu> good luck
#57169 [ + | - ] 636
<Phaze> SOME HOT CHICK
<Phaze> JUST MAILED ME
<Phaze> HER NEW PICS
<Phaze> WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
<N1k1tA> me too
<N1k1tA> she also offered penis enlargement
<N1k1tA> and home loans