hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21105 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#81842 [ + | - ] -81
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} soemtime
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} or get huge ass fan
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} :D
{@III-wiz} quiet*
{@III-wiz} wiz*
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} wel ima putt a courq in yer moth
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} :D
{@III-wiz} cork*
{@III-wiz} mouth*
{@III-wiz} pu...fuckit
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} put*
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} gedez
{@Stoner-EH} yer ferkin nutz whiz
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} where idd u take eglsh?
{@Stoner-EH} engish?
{@Stoner-EH} err
{@Stoner-EH} engrish
{+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} i tink dis es besh.org materl
#81840 [ + | - ] 241
[Unforgiven] you needed help to share a printer, and you
administer a unix box?
[doot]  windows is tough
#81838 [ + | - ] 159
<Oni> It seems when SE goes down, we get a lot of new users.
* Chop-Logik has joined #sensibleerection
<Malshai> And some tards.
<Chop-Logik> MY GURLFRIEND IS SO HOT!
<Oni> Yeah, gotta love those tards.
<Malshai> WITH A BIG BUSH
#81837 [ + | - ] 408
[tiger_yamato] I like to get ebooks on my emulated palm pilot
[tiger_yamato] It's sad when you think about it
[tiger_yamato] I'm using my computer to emulate a palm pilot
to emulate a book..
[tiger_yamato] And I work at a LIBRARY of all things
[mappyman] haha! now THATS funny
[tiger_yamato] People tell me this book is great, or that book
is great
[tiger_yamato] And I come home and download it
#81836 [ + | - ] 154
<Xan> I wish I had a time machine
<Xan> I would write in the bible "....and every sunday send $5
to <my address>"
<Xan> "If you don't you'll go to hell"
#81834 [ + | - ] 159
<Izzy-chan> Update (MSNBC): Basra Surrounded by US forces.
<SirLudicrus> Update (my penis): Erect.
#81833 [ + | - ] 184
<Ober> hahaha
<infi> ?
<Ober> MSNBC "No Iraqi Dikes have been blown"
<VistA> lol
<infi> heh
<Ober> the guy said "ahh"
<dragonbyt> dont dykes lack the equipment to get blown?
<Ober> after the word blown
<Ober> like he did a double take
#81831 [ + | - ] 414
<BlazeHedgehog> BIKKU BANG ATTAAAACK :|
<NikJam> k
<Spazzy-the-Ninja> Hmm, odd. The finger is bleeding more than
usual.
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<Torture> holy cow
<Torture> YOU'RE POWERFUL BLAZE
#81829 [ + | - ] 154
h4zin: Auuuuuuuuuugh
h4zin: i got fucking dumped. already.
h4zin: at least her T1 was firewalled, so its not like i could
have gotten anything out of her anyway
#81828 [ + | - ] 321
<Ein-> ha, I bet my school is a million times worse
<Pez666> Doubt it.
<Pez666> Unless it's a community college.
<Ein-> ever live with a 300lb man in a skirt?
<Pez666> Man our "dorm" is a fucking hotel they cleaned out.
<Pez666> and they just added it this semester.
<Ein-> so I take that as a "no", you never put up with the
sounds of a vibrator being shoved up the ass of a sweaty 300lb
man in a skirt before.
<Scarly> wtf
<Scarly> Ew
<Scarly> Ewwwww
<Pez666> haha
* RobertRence recoils in shock and horror.
<Scarly> Ewwwwwwwwwww
<RobertRence> Pleaaaase tell me you're lying.
<RobertRence> And that you washed your hands afterwards.
#81819 [ + | - ] 201
<MrCubanMafia> I love women. I love every bone in their body.
Especially mine.
#81811 [ + | - ] 109
therealspm: u busy whackin off again
wispyspark: no it wasnt leting me
#81810 [ + | - ] 242
<Misty> ...but it's sold out. ;.;
<Sue>  ;_;
<Alex> Her eyes are producing commas...
<Alex> Maybe you should get that checked
#81804 [ + | - ] 213
<Moiee> i have perfect biceps
<demalavor> only in one arm though
#81801 [ + | - ] 151
<Black_Raven> how can u tell if pretzels r stale?
<Kreskin> how?
<Black_Raven> i dont know why do u think i am asking?
#81785 [ + | - ] 393
<dabblerblue> i wonder if anyone in iraq has tried
rocket-jumping yet
<DJTodd> Rocket jumping?
<dabblerblue> nevermind
#81779 [ + | - ] 170
[Magus1] I don't crap regularly :(
[AmphibianKnight] You talk daily, don't you?
#81778 [ + | - ] 396
<Renzian> ahh i just swallowed a quarter
<ChrisAFK[motfR3]> ...
<ChrisAFK[motfR3]> You swallowed a coin?
<Aspect> You only have to be worried if you shit out two dimes
and a nickel.
#81775 [ + | - ] 186
[MonkeyG0D]: gonna go try linux
[MonkeyG0D]: i'm quite excited
[SPo0n]: hope it works for ya
[MonkeyG0D]: will i grow a beard?
[SPo0n]: yes all linux users must have beards, like jews.
#81762 [ + | - ] 234
<Verl> so who like cherries
<Qtip43> i like to pop them
<Qtip43> with my penos
<Verl> youre a virgin arent you
<Qtip43> totally
<Qtip43> by choice i might add
#81760 [ + | - ] 80
<whiprush> #debian is pretty intense too ...
<whiprush> I don't see how anyone can get help in that place.
<ronelson> well whip, you just apt-get irc-logs when you need
them :P
<whiprush> ronelson: can you?
#81759 [ + | - ] 170
-usagi- attacking asians doesn't bother me tubby
-Seethroc- Calling me tubby doesn't bother me either, Mr.
Drives-girls-to-being-dykes.
-usagi- At least I can get girls in my area code
-Seethroc- Yeah, at least you have that. Cling to it like a
motherfucker.
-usagi- Oh, I will.
#81744 [ + | - ] 291
<seaslug> the amish pick wierd names for their towns
<seaslug> for example, i've been to intercourse, pennsylvania
<ctkrohn> If there was a town named "sex" in Maine, it would
be written on am envelope as Sex ME
<seaslug> it goes without saying that i've never been to
intercourse
<bpt> "How did your trip go?" "I never made it to Orgasm"
#81739 [ + | - ] 797
<FGDH> holy fuck, i was talking to this girl i like and we
were flirting ..
<ToG> And...
<FGDH> then she said.."Tell your trousers to stop pointing at
me".. FUCK
#81736 [ + | - ] 146
<SROL> Alright! I just gave advice on which underwear/bra
combo to wear to a party to my New York ho :D
<TheBaskinator> What's his name?
#81732 [ + | - ] 27
<Arawn> wtf is up w/ computer geeks thinking they're black?
#81730 [ + | - ] 409
<mithrandi> In addition, U.S. citizens attempting to speak a
foreign language are
<mithrandi> urged to curb their Americanisms.
<mithrandi> For example:
<mithrandi> Correct  : Est-ce que vous l'avez aux autres
couleurs?
<mithrandi> Incorrect: Est-ce que vous, like, l'avez aux,
like, autres couleurs?
<mithrandi> ROFL!
<Antish> is that supposed to be arabic
#81725 [ + | - ] 84
<linux-n00b> Now how do I edit a .php in frontpage?
#81723 [ + | - ] 18
<Space_Boy> 70% of statistics are made up on the spot
#81705 [ + | - ] 195
<fo0bar> why the hell is tivo recording cnn?  I told it I
wanted first-run wars ONLY
<fo0bar> this is obviously a repeat
#81695 [ + | - ] 118
* Veng notices that "shock and awe" is an anagram of A Shack
0wned :)
(@Veng): sums it up really
#81617 [ + | - ] 183
<drwiii> Happiness is: seeing a news report about how the US
government stresses that the conflict in Iraq isn't motivated
by a need for "Christian dominance", followed by a commercial
for Time Life's "Worship Together" CD set.
#81616 [ + | - ] 337
Mmytacism: http://popcap.com/gamepopup.php?theGame=
insaniquarium
Mmytacism: this game is so unrealistic
Mmytacism: your common goldfish doesn't cost $100
Mmytacism: then again, I suppose it doesn't defecate coins,
either
#81534 [ + | - ] 185
<Dayv> I mean, if we decide that the next one sucks too, do we
just keep bombing 'til the Iraqi supreme court elects Jeb
Bush?
#81512 [ + | - ] 229
<Skipp-XP> ok, I don't have a lot of time but I want to ask a
quick question
<Skipp-XP> I have a style writer II printer, and I want to
connect it to my mac
<barry> use the included cable
<Skipp-XP> barry: go fuck yourself
<Lint> good way to get help retard.
#81453 [ + | - ] 424
<TygerinFL> Halfy... remember the house I lived in when you
and Vio visited us?
<HalfNote5> Yupper!
<TygerinFL> It burned to the ground tuesday night.
<TygerinFL> the lady living in it died
<TygerinFL> guess we shouldn't have taken all the smoke
detectors when we left
#81451 [ + | - ] 44
* @Steve is suspicious of the one extremely off-colored Honey
Comb cereal piece.
<@Steve> This is, like, affirmative action cereal.
* @Steve segregates and puts the darkie in the trash.
<@Jsangspar> it was a honeyCOON
#81449 [ + | - ] 615
<mewse> that was awesome
<mewse> err wrong window
<zarcyb> mewse: cybering? :P
* mewse licks it
<mewse> FUCK WRONG WINDOW
#81439 [ + | - ] 208
<DooD> All of the Kmart's in iraq will be closed, and reopen
as Targets in the next two weeks...
#81434 [ + | - ] 223
* The following takes place the day after the Second Gulf War
began.

<@HEMI> kjfklsdf
<@HEMI> All hell is breaking loose!
<@HEMI> Things are falling apart at work. I just got back from
lunch. Yay!
<@TenBaseT> god damn you
<@TenBaseT> I just hit refresh on 6 news sites because of
that.
#81427 [ + | - ] 629
<nikoJ> Terron, what would you do without the internet?
<Terron> I don't understand the question
#81394 [ + | - ] 2
<RichiH> bathing supports terrorism
#81382 [ + | - ] 1266
Rimbaud: oh my god
Rimbaud: do you have half a minute?
tlaryko: yes. what?
Rimbaud: I just opened a package for the office
Rimbaud: addressed to ________(1)
Rimbaud: I thought it was toner
Rimbaud: :/
Rimbaud: HARDCORE DVD GAY PORN
tlaryko: ?!?!?!?!?!?! :-))
Rimbaud: He's not here, thank god
Rimbaud: We're all pissing ourselves laughing
Rimbaud: I taped it back up
tlaryko: poor puggy!
Rimbaud: Seriously grim front cover too
Rimbaud: I'm disturbed
tlaryko: can i tell my sister? this is too funny
Rimbaud: sure
tlaryko: oh I had a mighty good chuckle.
Rimbaud: _______(2) was barely surprised
Rimbaud: Although she's still laughing hysterically
Rimbaud: Apparently my reaction was funny
tlaryko: what was your reaction?
Rimbaud: Before I had finished opening it, I made some comment
about it probably being gay porn for _________(1)
Rimbaud: Then it was
Rimbaud: And I sort of screamed in fright
tlaryko: hehehehehehehehe
#81379 [ + | - ] 163
<Juz[code]> i think i will call
<Juz[code]> the 5th level in my puzzle game
<Juz[code]> "i'm bored of making levels now"
#81378 [ + | - ] 299
<Gwuffy> yay getting new linkin park album
<CoRDS> are you about to break?
<Gwuffy> nope
<Gwuffy> but im one step closer
<CoRDS> thats way too much angst for one person
<devkev> he needs a little room to breathe
#81331 [ + | - ] 259
<PGM> i thought they where all lame
<Nastard> and since you are the barometer of lame by which we
all calibrate our instruments, you would know
#81325 [ + | - ] 22
<jedix> Linus: and your arms are.. a) as big as twigs b) steal
gurders c) the train itself
<dwihno> I always keep it in my special handthingy when I run
<jimperson> aha! a custom special handthingy! exactly what i
need :)
<Linus> jedix: they are huge! :-)
<Linus> as are all hacker arms
* Zagor tries not to laugh
* Bagder giggles as he can't resist
* jedix runs to the bathroom to not piss himself
#81320 [ + | - ] 373
MultiColoredWiz: My grammar's usually pretty good, but I still
don't get laid or lain.
MultiColoredWiz: err..
Gizmog1: Heheh.
#81299 [ + | - ] 805
<mefod> WHY DOESNT ANYONE BELIEVE ME?! IM IN IRAQ DAMNIT!
<mefod> ooh shit
<mefod> afk, war
#81296 [ + | - ] 242
<daenonok> texas vs iraq round one
<b1u3> im not particularly worried that iraq start sending ppl
over here...but i live in ca, right on the coast, if they did
i'd taste the first wave
<b1u3> so right now im sittin here, all the lights turned off,
in my faded army fatiques, new tank of co2 in my paintball
gun, ready to give anyone to come through my door a hell of a
bruise