hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21105 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#84825 [ + | - ] 98
<Hostile blinks>
<MacBinaryBot> You blink, I stink, we're pink.
<Hostile> you dink
<MacBinaryBot> You kink
<Hostile> youd think
<MacBinaryBot> You're gonna sink.
<Hostile> ok *wink*
<MacBinaryBot> heh
<MacBinaryBot> Time to twink.
<Hostile> silly chink
<MacBinaryBot> Long link
<Hostile> is it mink?
<MacBinaryBot> Need zinc!
<Hostile> lol you wrink
<MacBinaryBot> You're covered in ink.
<Hostile> bah thats what i was gonna use, you .... erm bink
-.-
<Hostile> k i lose
<Hostile> *cry*
<MacBinaryBot> lol, finque
<Hostile> -.-
<Hostile> time for me to go shrink
#84814 [ + | - ] 419
<CommanderStab> When I was 10 me and this friend of mine who
was four years older than me made this Visual Basic game
called Fatal Move. Basically these pictures he drew would pop
up with some text like "This guy is a geek! Let's kill him!!"
and then if you clicked yes another picture would be shown
with him dead, and if you clicked no some guy called you a
wimp and the game quit.
<Bleeding> did the irony of u saying 'lets kill geeks' in a
game u wrote in vb ever sink in?
<CommanderStab> His character was called "Carrot Head" and he
was this cool looking carrot with a special knife.
<CommanderStab> My chracter was "Unco-body the Head Shaker"
who was some retarded guy with a gun he couldn't aim properly
with, and he just sat there laughing goofily all the time.
<Bleeding> gee let me guess who wore the pants in ur
friendship
#84813 [ + | - ] 457
<matt> mang
<matt> i gotta send some logs down stream
<matt> but my roommate just got in the shower
<markus> so go stank up the bathroom
<matt> i assume the door is locked
<markus> just push it under the door then
#84811 [ + | - ] 950
MicrowavedPuppy: I was detailing etc on the car today
MicrowavedPuppy: and this like 6 year old comes up all timid
MicrowavedPuppy: she says,hi i like your car alot
MicrowavedPuppy: i might want one just like it when i grow up
MicrowavedPuppy: then she goes
MicrowavedPuppy: APRIL FOOLS!
MicrowavedPuppy: and runs off laughing her ass off to her
friends in the street
#84810 [ + | - ] 999
*In private*
<KaaLee> Well, he hasn't said a thing while I've been in here.
<CommanderStab> He must be idling or something. I'll draw him
out. Just watch!!

*In the chat room*
[22:10:33] <CommanderStab> Hey guys
[22:11:17] <D-BOY> Fuck off stabb nobody wants to fucking hear
what you have to say

*In private*
<CommanderStab> Ta-daaa!! Less than a minute!! That's gotta be
a record!!!!!!
<KaaLee> Your skills of annoyance are above us all
#84806 [ + | - ] 631
*MulletMan removes his pants
*BobZilla sets mode +pants MulletMan
<MulletMan> fuck you
#84805 [ + | - ] 276
* jwz has sh0px0red
<ogw-iii> whatcha get for me?
<@jwz> plastic bags
<@jwz> slightly used
#84803 [ + | - ] 1907
Reelr123: whats up
k8 z swimmer: who are you?
Reelr123: you dont remember?
k8 z swimmer: nope
Reelr123: i m bummed
k8 z swimmer: clay?
Reelr123: nope
k8 z swimmer: ooool
k8 z swimmer: k
k8 z swimmer: so who the heck are ya
Reelr123: its me
Reelr123: guess
Reelr123: i have admired you for a long time
k8zswimmer: Who are you?
Reelr123: i have known u for a long time
k8zswimmer: way to freak me out yo
Reelr123: I love you more then the world
k8zswimmer: tmi.... WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!
Reelr123: I know exactly what u r doing as we speak. And you
better get to bed right this instant
Reelr123: or u r grounded from the computer
k8zswimmer: MOM?!?
#84797 [ + | - ] -425
Motorbreath151: i'm gonna grow my hair and beard like sam
jackson's in this movie
Motorbreath151: i'm the foot fuckin' master
TheOffspring326: yea
TheOffspring326: you should become black too
Motorbreath151: lemme try
TheOffspring326: just rub shit all over your body
TheOffspring326: haha
Motorbreath151: hahaha
Motorbreath151: man that's wrong on so many levesl
TheOffspring326: then you'll smell AND look like them
#84795 [ + | - ] 5
<Oki> omg
<Oki> 12:25p   EnterTheGame  SecurityServices  : We will be
validating your network access in a few moments... Please
don't be alarmed if you notice a couple connections on your
firewall during this scan.
<Oki> I thought it said "Please don't be ashamed if you notice
a couple connections on your firewall during this scan."
#84793 [ + | - ] 245
<fmadero> banshee what service starts submission??
<loucura> fmadero: bdsmServ
#84790 [ + | - ] 372
<g3nocide> lol why the fuck would dreamweaver try to open an
mp3 file ?
<m0rn> is it made by real? that would explain the sudden
determination to be used for everything
#84788 [ + | - ] 30
<@Kiddy_C> \:=|
<@Kiddy_C> ^ hitlet
#84780 [ + | - ] 286
<deathazre> don't think this quite applies to twish, but
<@neotek> can you imagine how many neck injuries occur each
year from camwhores with small tits trying to lick their
nipples?
<AngelPHiSH[girl]> *lmao*
<AngelPHiSH[girl]> i cant lick my own nipple :(
<Nemessis> can i?
<AngelPHiSH[girl]> sure ^___^
<neko> i can lick my nipple
<Nemessis> leet
<neko> takes ages sewing it back on though
#84778 [ + | - ] 258
<Supergoad> im about to bid on a damn fine sexy router
<Supergoad> im gonna sleep with it, caress its ports with my
tounge
<Supergoad> then im gonna plug my cable into it
<Supergoad> and its LED's are gonna go wild
#84776 [ + | - ] 222
<reppy> I made her cum with the cock of fury!
<_bigd_> reppy, she made you buy the Cock of Fury(tm) and use
it on her?
#84765 [ + | - ] 736
[loucura] yummm... french fries and gravy
[Crysanna] you need cheese with that
[loucura] Yeah, but I don't feel like melting any cheese.
[loucura] That, and all I have is american cheese, I'm afraid
it'll go to war with my french fries
#84762 [ + | - ] 490
*** fluffy` changes topic to 'Anyone have cracked cm4? e-mail
xxx@xxx.xxx'
*** Quits: fluffy` (cya)
*** JzY|aw is now known as fluffy`
*** fluffy` changes topic to 'Anyone have Frankie does Carlos
4? e-mail xxx@xxx.xxx'
*** fluffy` is now known as JzY
#84757 [ + | - ] 773
<Schismo5000>Did you know Hitler couldn't have kids?
<PeterH>...
<Schismo5000>Yea, he was anti-semenic
<PeterH>Dude, thats anti semeTic, and it means he hated jews
<Schismo5000>Oh
<Schismo5000>>_<
<PeterH>o_O
#84756 [ + | - ] 360
Sardonyx: what do you do when a girl likes you and you have no
like there of
DooD: do what they do to you if the positions were reversed
DooD: string them along forever
DooD: slowly destroying their heart from the inside out
Sardonyx: i don't think i have the patients for that
#84743 [ + | - ] 437
Ubergamer: I think the idea that good things come to those who
wait comes from the fact that, due to probability theory, on a
long enough timeline there is a good chance that at least two
good things will occur
Ben: or it's a saying started by people who don't wait that
want more good things for themselves
Ben: so they tell those who wait to keep waiting
Ubergamer: they should modernize that saying
Ubergamer: hot chicks come to guys who masturbate
Ben: haha
Ben: and said thusly, one can see the absurdity
Ben: we have successfully debunked an aphorism
Ubergamer: yay!
#84735 [ + | - ] 304
<ue-Soul_Chaser> yeah sniper, normally, you can't stick your
penis all the way unless you would want to rip her cervix
apart
<ue-Soul_Chaser> or, in your case, his rectum
#84729 [ + | - ] 19
<Leeide> i found some jewish rap one time
<Leeide> it was pimp
<Leeide> was like......Two Live Jews or soemthing
#84725 [ + | - ] 21
<SuperVeggie> tubgirl makes me thirsty :\
<SuperVeggie> it looks like some sort of curry flavoured milk
#84711 [ + | - ] 119
<@Chimerasame> pancake bukkake :9
<@Chimerasame> it's just syrup from a bunch of aunt jemima
bottles
#84710 [ + | - ] 244
<vortex> Emo lol. The intentionally bad singing of punk with
all the angst and whining of a 13 year olds Livejournal
#84705 [ + | - ] 275
<Bob> my gf is so cool...
<zkcerF> yer...corpses can get pretty cold...
#84702 [ + | - ] 205
<@neko|stoned> when i first got into warez, i downloaded
shindlers list
<@neko|stoned> i deleted it thinking it was a bad copy
<@neko|stoned> :/
#84700 [ + | - ] 841
<Iconoplast> why do people insist in distributing things in
real audio format?
<cowofdoom> because they love Hitler.
<Iconoplast> that's what i was thinking.
#84699 [ + | - ] 184
<Hanh> my mom aided in the development of the korean deathbox
<K> what is that?
<Hanh> Ford Ka
<Hanh> or anything from Daihatsu
<K> gah
<K> i remember that car.. didn't stick around for too long..
<K> your mom is in the auto industry then?
<Hanh> yes
<Hanh> mainly developing backseats
<Hanh> and breaking them in
#84697 [ + | - ] -18
<slope_xb> American one = The Rung
<slope_xb> er
<slope_xb> Ring
<Jeff`> the rung
<slope_xb> woo i kan type f00
<Jeff`> rofl
<Jeff`> that would be an interesting movie
<SwizzleStick> the ladder or death
<slope_xb> the Ring, the Rang, the Rung
<slope_xb> :D
<SwizzleStick> the top rung kills you
<Jeff`> "SOMEDAY, I WILL CLIMB THIS LADDER"
<Jeff`> "ONE RUNG AT A TIME"
<slope_xb> Ring Rang Rung... almost as bad as Ching Chang
Chong
<Jeff`> the movie about a boy who climbs a ladder
#84696 [ + | - ] 432
* slippy drags you upstairs
<ginge> !
<slippy> to bed..
<ginge> !!
<slippy> to sleep!
<ginge> :(
<slippy> after a bit
<ginge> ;)
#84692 [ + | - ] 1682
<MillitePress> Yeah, it's about masturbation and stuff. Weird
book.
<jamessheen> whats masturbation
<MillitePress> ...
<Kail> ...
<Nikul> ...
<MillitePress> It's a touchy subject
#84688 [ + | - ] 181
<phr0work> I buffer overflowed my penis last night
#84661 [ + | - ] 266
<CryptoKnight> i was at my girlfriend's house yesterday
<CryptoKnight> and we are having sex
<Hektik_Sniper> ...
<Hektik_Sniper> TMI
<CryptoKnight> and then we hear her mom and her mom's
boyfriend in the next room getting started
<Hektik_Sniper> ...
<CryptoKnight> and then they finish
<CryptoKnight> and then i'm still going
<Hektik_Sniper> SHUT IT YOUR MAKING BABY JESUS CRY!!!!!!!
<CryptoKnight> and this morning that fuck calls me a "minute
man "
<Hektik_Sniper> ...
<CryptoKnight> heh
#84582 [ + | - ] 229
<MexHammer> I mean, come on, aren't at least 20% of Star Trek
episodes ones where they end up going back to Earth circa 1920
- 1945? They have millions of planets and who knows how much
time and they have hundreds of episodes with that premise? If
Star Trek was a person, it'd be you. And I'd beat it up.
#84556 [ + | - ] 321
cougah66: dude, i am so uber fucked
cougah66: I mean, the uberness, of the fuckage....it boggles
the mind
#84470 [ + | - ] 314
<Hackster> oh, i crack me up.
<lophyte> you crack me up too
<lophyte> *snuggles close to Hackster*
<lophyte> ;)
<Hackster> really.
<Hackster> awww. *lick*
<lophyte> yay :D
<p1asm1c> get a dcc chat you two
#84463 [ + | - ] 1331
<BlackJaX> Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing
paperclips"
#84451 [ + | - ] 1939
*** Now talking in #12-15yrz
<Salamander> Hi all!!
<Petri> Hi a/s/l?
<Salamander> 53/m/CA
<Petri> I think ur in the rong place
<Salamander> Oh no, I dont think I am...
#84440 [ + | - ] 409
*** Joins: azninvazn
[mcgruff] [mp3] abba - dancing queen @ 192 kbps
[owner] now playing: geri halliwell - it's rainin' men.mp3
[owner] you  just got one-upped gruff
[azninvazn] i don't know how i mistyped '#513' as '#
mp3sforqueers', but i'm getting the fuck out of here
*** Parts: azninvazn
[mcgruff] ^5
#84421 [ + | - ] 807
<Killzig> you guys want to hear something fucked up i did at
work today, which I blame all of you for -- by the way
<Insane-Lark> sure
<Dan`> ?
<Killzig> I faxed a quote to a client and wrote "K THX BYE" on
the bottom
#84409 [ + | - ] 150
<wizards23> anyone get the game madden 2003 from k-mart like
me ?
<drunkers> dont ever say that out loud
<wizards23> what that i got madden?
<drunkers> no that you shop at k-mart
#84402 [ + | - ] 313
<drunkers> is your real name gabe?
<Gabe-33> yes
<drunker> ever concider killing your parents with a shovel?
<Gabe-33> no
<drunker> concider it
#84401 [ + | - ] 287
<CaMR0N> why does everyone call me cumron?
<drunkers> probably and honest mistake
<CaMR0N> but everyone?
<drunkers> did you tell them you were gay?
<CaMR0N> yes cause im honest with everyone
<drunkers> maybe its not an honest mistake then
#84392 [ + | - ] 312
<drunkers> u arab?
<Zelbinian> Nope.
<drunkers> good
<Zelbinian> Irish, French, and English.
<drunkers> geez
<drunkers> u moms a whore
#84373 [ + | - ] 271
<slippy> wtf is this shit on bbc1
<slippy> how on earth do you prevent friendly fire?
<slippy> don't fight with the americans?
<slippy> hrhrhr
<doggie^> hahah
<doggie^> maybe if we painted all our military equipment red
white and blue
<doggie^> they would be so overcome with patriotism they
wouldnt be able to blow us up
<slippy> lol
<slippy> paint golden arches on all the tanks
<slippy> then a little sign under saying "this is not a
drive-thru, you dopey obese fools"
<doggie^> hahaha
#84335 [ + | - ] 68
froovgloobular: I SO NEED more holes :-(
froovgloobular: in my ears.
#84333 [ + | - ] 142
* dbzfreak pokes javabie
* javabie fights back by talking javabieish
<@javabie> hy
<@javabie> how r u
<@javabie> asl
<@javabie> ??????????????????/??//?/?????????????
<@javabie> ?
<@javabie> ???????????///
<@dbzfreak> ..*DIES*
#84331 [ + | - ] -24
<Kel> [kel@purgatory~]% sudo cp ~rick/newshots ~kel/.
<Kel> cp: cannot stat `/home/rick/newshots': No such file or
directory
<Kel> [kel@purgatory~]% oh wait
<Rick_Hunter> newshot, not newshots :P
<Kel> typo
<Rick_Hunter> lol.
<Rick_Hunter> [kel@purgatory~]% oh wait
<Rick_Hunter> ^_^
<Kel> huh?
<Kel> you punk, you screen'd my terminal didn'cha? :P
<Rick_Hunter> I what?
<Kel> how'd you know I did that?
<Rick_Hunter> You pasted it. :P
<Kel> I did?
<Kel> oh
<Kel> ha ha ha
<Rick_Hunter> bash.org
<Rick_Hunter> ^_^
<Kel> no!