hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21102 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#1734 [ + | - ] 539
::: .signoff@2.59p> Townshend
(wang@cb31185-c.rmdws1.il.home.com); Geek used to be a
4-letter word; now it's a 6-figure one.
#1733 [ + | - ] 102
<twist> I masturbated to a dreamcast game once
<twist> It was a fighting game, and 2 of the chicks had very
large breasts
<twist> and their breasts jiggled when they moved
#1732 [ + | - ] 400
<nailhead> Ya, How come there's albinos in all races but
theres no ppl that are
the opposeite? like "alblackos" or sumpin?
#1731 [ + | - ] 1179
<outcaste> When I was single, I used super sensitive condoms.
<outcaste> They were so sensitive that they'd stick around and
talk to the chiq
for an hour after I'd gone
#1730 [ + | - ] 9317
<Mikkel> If you went camping and you got REALLY drunk with
your friend and you
woke up the next morning with a condom stuck up your ass would
you tell anybody?
<Celestya> i dont think so
<Mikkel> Wanna go camping?
#1729 [ + | - ] 904
<blinkchik> can i become a bot and how??
#1728 [ + | - ] 1102
<Jeffwey> i will buy a camoflouged condom so u wont see me
coming
#1727 [ + | - ] 1677
<Fly_kEaT> ok so what time now in russia?
<amsea_> 17:06
<Fly_kEaT> am or pm?
#1723 [ + | - ] 1488
<k-rad-bob> i made an avi of me jacking off
<k-rad-bob> then i jacked off while watching it
* linKnee is afk: PUKING
#1716 [ + | - ] 100
<occifer> my penis was fat
<occifer> not to long ago
<occifer> so i employed a well known chineese remedy
<occifer> you simple tug and pull at it for a couple of
minutes
#1713 [ + | - ] 258
<odinnn> i used to be scared i would turn into a mexican if i
ate too much
mexican food
#1711 [ + | - ] 380
<Zorglub> will php work on old browsers?
#1704 [ + | - ] 1017
<tress> I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me
before we met.
#1703 [ + | - ] 276
<Rapture> i need to hit someone
<Rapture> a guy from work just came online
<Rapture> can we smurf him
#1701 [ + | - ] 1326
<Camo> tress, how do I make a program that makes the cd spin
really fast and  does't stop and if you open the cdrom drive,
the cd flies out and cuts your  throat?
#1700 [ + | - ] 104
thep0et> i can pull my scrotum up to the point where it looks
like a pussy
#1699 [ + | - ] 62
<thep0et> working sucks, i stay home all day
<thep0et> i might as well be black
#1698 [ + | - ] 444
<Sharkey> I think it's time I did a major redesign.
<MightyQuinn> you mean change the background to a different
gaudy stripe pattern?
#1693 [ + | - ] 432
<Eibii> I'm crossdressing for the next con, thank ye gods.
Fewer chunky Star Trek fanboys in bad latex following me
around and asking me to dinner, at least. THe joy of sexual
alienation...
#1683 [ + | - ] 379
<WCMaxi> in Austraila you are only gay if you receive so it is
possible to make people gay!
#1682 [ + | - ] 579
<stc> all us asians look alike
<stc> so getting in with older brother id's is easy heh
#1681 [ + | - ] 505
<_|LoCo|> any1 know whats the last album of paul oakenfold?
<al-x> Paul Oakenfold Presents Another Shitty ALbum With All
The Same Tracks As the Last 3 Albums
#1680 [ + | - ] 1259
<timmo> if i were to take a stab in the dark as to what orion
is pissed about
<timmo> i would have to say its women troubles
<orion> next time you take a stab at something, aim for your
eye
#1679 [ + | - ] 674
<Snapperhe> what 'flavour' of linux do you use?
<al-x> strawberry
<al-x> WITH A HINT OF NERDNILLA
#1678 [ + | - ] 849
<SEoD> ooooh, my mac is gorgeous
<SEoD> it's so expensive and see-thru
<Xlord> sounds like some women I know
#1677 [ + | - ] 578
<jidan> he's so fat he prolly has to guess what fold the
fucking piss is gonna spray out of
#1676 [ + | - ] 425
<Daft> anyone know of any really good gardening irc channels?
#1675 [ + | - ] 542
<MrWizard> do you even have one story where you dont smoke
weed?
<priz> hmmmm i really dont think so, heh
<priz> well, actually one time catlord had to EAT a joint
before we could smoke it cuz the cops were after us
#1674 [ + | - ] 710
<SlimZ> i like my pickup line
<SlimZ> "move i need to get a drink"
#1673 [ + | - ] 294
<LkTrout1> enex's underwear is big enough to fit over Hatter's
ego.
#1672 [ + | - ] 850
(Stacey```) i'd like to know who the fuck encodes shit to real
player
(Stacey```) so i can kick their ass
#1671 [ + | - ] 563
(BudhaM0nk) i want hard drives so small i can snort them up
like powder and increase my brain capacity
#1670 [ + | - ] 401
<kisama> just leave clues as to your modem
<kisama> motive*
#1667 [ + | - ] 520
(iSONEWS) [iSONEWS] Update in DivX: My Life *CLASSIC* released
by MEDiAMANiACS (49 files, 08/12/2001) www.isonews.com/r/?
155D256CD=
(`Thunder) whoa
(`Thunder) they released my life
(`Thunder) how did they tape all that?!
(madman`) no way!! stop lying! it's MY LIFE!!
(runner-) either way its gonna be boring
#1663 [ + | - ] 939
<goltrpoat> 'britney spears' is an anagram for
'presbyterians.'
#1661 [ + | - ] 436
<Xerox> STOP CONTROLLING MY MIND!
<DigiGnome> If I did that, you'd fall into a lifelss heap by
your computer, and only be found days later when the
neighbours get suspicious about the change of smell coming
from your room.
#1660 [ + | - ] 7930
<DigiGnome> Real life should have a fucking search function,
or something.
<DigiGnome> I need my socks.
#1659 [ + | - ] 408
<ix> man that offer for cash perked you right up
<vermifuge> i didnt even get to the most appealing part
<vermifuge> there will be a bucket of fried chicken here for
your consumption
<goatb0y> well that fucking settles it
<goatb0y> any collared greens by chance?
<vermifuge> dude there could be
#1658 [ + | - ] 512
<bigPIMP> are you a virgin?
<kink> yes
<kink> giving it up to a non-linux using chick is like giving
it up to a man, just wrong
#1656 [ + | - ] 462
<JD> AFAIK, Anubis is the only Egyptian god who is often drawn
with an
erect penis.
<JD> Really!
DigiGnðme> I thought they all were.
DigiGnðme> Oh no, that's the Kama Sutra.
#1655 [ + | - ] 883
<JD> I, or one of my teammates, shall cause you to become
electroencephalographically challenged.
Mr Brown> ill kill you
<JD> No, I like the way I say it better
#1654 [ + | - ] 358
Mr Brown> ill snip ur ass
<JD> I'll carry that flag so good, you won't know what hit ya
<JD> Wait, that didn't sound very threatening...
#1651 [ + | - ] 604
(tinkrbell) my dog humps my other guy dog.. instead of my girl
dog.. at least he's comfortable with himself and realized it
at an early age
#1648 [ + | - ] 667
IoStream 14: LOL
IoStream 14: radio
IoStream 14: "some dude was having sex with this girl and she
said stop stop i'm about to orgasm...he asked why stop? and
she said i'm saving it for when i get married"
#1645 [ + | - ] 518
n e r d b 5: umm.
n e r d b 5: geforce
n e r d b 5: i dont like em
n e r d b 5: i like nvidia
n e r d b 5: 32mb
n e r d b 5: they rocks
e l i t e m r p: nvidia makes geforce
#1641 [ + | - ] 459
[tonsai] i once bought a non-lubricated mint condom just to
taste it.
#1640 [ + | - ] 1545
<Inoshiro> Wth
<Inoshiro> "Don't iron, don't put in a triangle, don't put in
an oval"
<harb> Er?
<Inoshiro> Is there a translation table for the washing tag on
clothing?
#1639 [ + | - ] 690
<harb> Shee.. I search for "linux unix bsd" on dice.com and it
returns ONE job that's a sendmail admin. wtf.
<acestus> What a sick job.
<acestus> "What do you think you can bring to our company as
the sendmail admin?"
<acestus> "qmail."
#1637 [ + | - ] 413
<_Delirium> "Perl is awk with skin cancer.  And it's ugly
too." -my cs professor
#1636 [ + | - ] 619
<DragonRe> gabe: what i did to you was love goddamit
<gabe> maybe in alabama.