hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21103 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#6511 [ + | - ] 1406
<monami> this utility has a macro recording function but no
loop command
<monami> so i record a macro, and then put a stapler on the
keyboard to hold the button down
<monami> and go have coffee
<monami> i note that the stapler, on the whole, is a more
efficient and productive employee than i am
#6508 [ + | - ] -21
[1:02pm] <+weeve> now kthx bye now you don't exist on my
harddrive or in my memorys anymore try not thinking your a 22
year old mack with a good job and gf and accept who you are I
am 6'8 and 245 I'm a black belt in ju jitsu unlike you lieing
kiddies wanna spar come to me I'm bored now
[1:02pm] weeve «~Eden@ip68-10-94-135.rn.hr.cox.net» has Quit
iRC (`docno==liar I love kiddies:) kthx)
#6505 [ + | - ] 259
<jeremiah> the other day, we were sitting there in class
during an awkward pause and the teacher was feeling all proud
of himself [...] and I say: "so mr critzer, when are you going
to get a real job?"
#6501 [ + | - ] 1120
<chin|werk> its not video games fault that its a lot of fun to
kill people
#6500 [ + | - ] 367
-^cell^- how fast is your processor?
«tylor» 56k
#6498 [ + | - ] 205
[01:58] *** Loops|ao changes topic to '<Neep> what are you
gonna do Bobo? || <Bobo> live in my parents' basement till i'm
47 and i die of autoerotic asphyxiation alone and a virgin'
#6493 [ + | - ] 468
<[Shinji]> Arrrr... bend over laddie and I'll show ye a
fishstick that makes it's OWN tatar sauce....#($*
#6492 [ + | - ] 207
<Bobo> Hobo-Niff, will you be my partner in dance dance
strangulation?
#6491 [ + | - ] 577
<SwampFox> "I'm sleeping with several local teens.  Find out
if your child is one of them at 11."
#6490 [ + | - ] 261
<Ashen> fucking hell
<Ashen> I just ate a paint chip I thought was a peanut
<Ashen> shit how much l;ead do you think is in a sealant
#6488 [ + | - ] 140
<firebone> btw my fav jpop group is Goa Tse Ceex
#6486 [ + | - ] 290
<wmf> AaronSw: what did I tell you about Stallman?
<AaronSw> not to have sex with him?
#6485 [ + | - ] 23
<blazemore> DJing with vinyl is like people still making soap
from their own pig fat
#6484 [ + | - ] 170
<luna> okay okay, so it *probably* isn't going to snow, but i
can
<luna> imagine it!
<roland> well, if we're imagining, i can imagine buxom women
will fall
<roland> from the sky like sexy hailstones.
#6483 [ + | - ] 386
<dj_ak> i just popped a zit on my shoulder
<dj_ak> and it hit me in the eye
<dj_ak> then i licked my eye
<splifs> women must love you
#6482 [ + | - ] 972
<funknut> I like my women like I like my coffee.
<Dokterrock> What, tied up in a sack and thrown over the back
of a burro?
#6481 [ + | - ] 166
<whaQd|cybering> any porn with cheese curls is pretty elite
#6480 [ + | - ] 1209
<axel026> i need help please
<^cell^> do you have an appointment?
<axel026> im french
<^cell^> i see... thats a terrible disorder
#6478 [ + | - ] 259
<HevyD> yea, one time I got caught masturbating and I yelled
at my dad telling him to go get help cause I had him caught
and I needed backup, boy that was akward
#6473 [ + | - ] 586
<trance> ooo the heat is on in my house, my dad must have
gotten a raise
#6472 [ + | - ] 303
<[werk]chin> (Bobo) "With the sam's deal on a 100 gb drive, im
able to download and store the porn of 10 regular men"
#6469 [ + | - ] 114
<MC_GREG> your hapkido will not save you when i am wiping your
asshole with your tongue
#6464 [ + | - ] 672
<chin|werk> msimn can kiss my fucking bloody ass
<chin|werk> outlook express is a little fucking drama queen
<chin|werk> "OOoOHHHH, YOU UPGRADED TO IE 6"
<chin|werk> "WELL IM NOT GONNA WORK ANYMORE"
#6461 [ + | - ] 288
<Flik> my friend gave up masturbation for lent, and lost in an
hour
#6460 [ + | - ] 10865
<studdud> what the fuck is wtf
#6459 [ + | - ] 1477
<Bobo> what's wrong with being a homosexual?
<klong> it's gay
#6458 [ + | - ] 281
<^erica^> god, why dont you apear infront of me when i pray?
<GodFu> because i like to watch
#6455 [ + | - ] 5
<^cell^> one of these days, ill get my friends and family
members and stuff to jump into the back of my truck, and all
277 of us will run over a bunch of french people
#6453 [ + | - ] 670
<O_6> my helpful nature gets me into many a snag
<MadMan37> so does your weakness for pic-a-nic baskets
#6450 [ + | - ] 126
<paper_bag> i have looked for so long for a channel that has
x-dccs with white poeple music
#6445 [ + | - ] 1648
<gh5046> beep boop beep boop beep beep boop
<skrike> thats right r2 we're going to cloud city
#6444 [ + | - ] 1124
<zhixel> I'd really like to meet a sane woman who doesn't have
to
constantly rely on me for emotional support
<far_call> and I'd really like to be able to drive my car to
jupiter
#6443 [ + | - ] 255
<signine> "PIPE YOUR OUTPUT THROUGH THAT, BITCH!"
<far_call> "you can stick that in your pipe and awk it"
#6442 [ + | - ] 246
<redhook> <--- 22
<redhook> and I got a 7 year old on my nuts, how pathetic
<redhook> s/7/17/
<redhook> that looked bad
#6441 [ + | - ] 10208
<Zanthis(ALE)> AFK, tornado
#6438 [ + | - ] 217
<shev> Efnet needs to get mIRC to include an air raid siren
wav file, and play it when there's a server hack
#6436 [ + | - ] 53
<tomed> hmm
<MrBawb> uh oh!
<MrBawb> tomed is thinking!
#6434 [ + | - ] 222
<Cheetah> heh, someone else who was on my box didn't like my
lack of bitchx ...
<sig11> heh?
<Cheetah> bitchx
<Cheetah> BitchX
<Cheetah> for fucks..
<Cheetah> (from .bash_history)
<Cheetah> who actually types things like for fucks.. into
their shell?
#6432 [ + | - ] 93
<PI^2> my first puter was c-64
<PI^2> I had many nasty games on c-64 :D
<PI^2> like 'fast masturbation' and such :)
<PI^2> that game was soo weird :D
<PI^2> though it had good graphics for a c-64 game :)
#6430 [ + | - ] 392
<TwoEight> heh, i dont even know how to hack a system
<TwoEight> i am always amazed when i hear such stories
<TheBigZ> hell, half the time I can't get into my own damn
box, much less someone elses
#6426 [ + | - ] 526
<BadlandZ> So, what's new, where are the bots?
<Sprout> they are eating lunch
<BadlandZ> heh.. together?
<Sprout> do you ever see bots eating with people?
#6422 [ + | - ] 420
<sp00t> the only trouble with watching dune is every time I
see that guy I expect him to pull out a palm pilot like thing
saying "Ziggy says theres a 45.2 percent chance that you're
here to save the whales"
#6420 [ + | - ] 400
--- [signoff!#windowmaker] NinjaCodr (wife getting naked)
#6419 [ + | - ] 200
<extremist> strep?
<extremist> that thing where girls take their clothes off?
#6418 [ + | - ] 9
<suchness> my ear wax is pure black!?!?!?!?!
<suchness> WTF
#6416 [ + | - ] 217
<Jason> What's NRE?
<Scott> NRE - New Relationship Energy!
<Scott> It's just like cocaine, only more expensive.
#6409 [ + | - ] 52
* Pixelz learnt everything he knows by playing pool
#6405 [ + | - ] 292
<wasabi> I wish catheters were comfortable and socially
acceptible
<wasabi> and that I had a minifridge under my desk
#6403 [ + | - ] 310
<cygnus> i need to go grocery shopping
<avi-> nice
<cygnus> i don't have shit for food
<avi-> that's a good thing, i've seen those shit eating videos
and it doesn't look tasty
#6401 [ + | - ] 544
<risca> how do you spell world?
<risca> as in "the whole world"
<mixie> world