hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21117 Approved Quotes | 3 in Moderation Queue
#36640 [ + | - ] 328
<iggz[work]> Indeed.
<iggz[work]> mav you might like this
<iggz[work]> http://sexyclube.uol.com.br/premium/galeria/
edicao260/modelo01_foto01.jpg?modelo01_foto22.jpg
<iggz[work]> http://asia.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science/09/20/
offbeat.sharks.virginbirth.reut/
<iggz[work]> no
<iggz[work]> fuck
<iggz[work]> not that
<iggz[work]> the second one
<iggz[work]> anyone who says anything dies
#36636 [ + | - ] 149
<Casper> Thursday I think I may steal the camaro and go get my
haircut.
<Phucker> Is it a mullet?
<Casper> My brother's camaro is awesome.
<Phucker> For a second there I thought 'camaro' said 'mullet'
<Phucker> I don't think the two terms can be seperated
#36635 [ + | - ] 48
<Inferi0r> sean, hrm, i cant buy "getting laid" on ebay
<Sean> "your search for 'getting laid' returned 0 results,
please check later
#36633 [ + | - ] 285
<@PrincessEvil2> <high school student> omg cleavage! i have
never seen that before! usually the porn on my computer has
chicks completely naked
<@Vekt0r-X> guess what i got in my hand right now?
<@PrincessEvil2> dont ask that right after i mention porn
#36628 [ + | - ] 1
<[C-22]Octal> one word duck tape!
<[C-22]Octal> well 2
#36627 [ + | - ] 361
<+RushMore> got shouted at today... too hairy
<@chikster> no beards at school?
<+RushMore> no beards
<@chikster> gayness to the extreme
<+RushMore> This is a catholic grammar school
<+RushMore> run by nuns
<+RushMore> arent allowed long hair either
<@chikster> a catholic school what the fuck? jesus had a beard
why cant you
<@chikster> he had long hair too
<@chikster> thats stupid as hell if jesus can you can i say
#36623 [ + | - ] 519
<jessepence> :-d
<jessepence> look I can lick my nose
#36622 [ + | - ] -74
<+timmo> i uploaded 146mb yesterday
<+RushMore> i have downloaded 1,174.19mb in 1day 4hours
<+Kuro_> that's 1.68kbps, timmo
<+Kuro_> for 24 hours
<+Kuro_> not too fast, but persistent like a nigger trying to
get out of a well
#36621 [ + | - ] 29
<m2-Cruiser> i gotta big fat dick for your mother fuckin mouth
<asmodius> :x
<m2-Cruiser> :o
<asmodius> :x
<moof> like this one? www.tnww.net/it/dick.jpg
<m2-Cruiser> not a valid url
<asmodius> omg you clicked on it
<moof> wtf you sick fuck.. you wanna see dick?
<asmodius> feg
<asmodius> :(
#36619 [ + | - ] 216
<daenonon^II> lol
<daenonon^II> i got pr0n downloading on limewire when this pop
up ad comes up
<daenonon^II> about some kind of pyramid scam
<daenonon^II> and somehow the search results window of
limewire didn't get covered by the testimonials of the pop up
<daenonon^II> "as a single mom, i like how hardcore fucking
gets xtreme!!"
#36615 [ + | - ] 249
<Auz> try my new script trigger !donothing
<AC|Malaki> lol
<AC|Malaki> !donothing
<Guildenstern> hehe
<AC|Malaki> ..
<AC|Malaki> hrm
<Guildenstern> hehehee
<beans> dumbass
<AC|Malaki> it not working..
<AC|Malaki> OI!
<AC|Malaki> git!
<AC|Malaki> =(
<beans> LOL
<beans> QUOTE!
#36613 [ + | - ] 302
<Ishtardances> See why dont guys have to prove they are "male"
on the internet?
<Slapahoewitapaperbag> because guys dominate the chatrooms
<Ishtardances> oh....I just figured they would be intimidated
by my large cock.
<slapahoewitapaperbag>...you are that same girl I just cybered
with right?
#36611 [ + | - ] 541
<dolbe> blll you really are such a loser
<blll> dolbe, that's like a quadrapelegic telling me I walk
funny
#36608 [ + | - ] 154
<NapkinEater> I hate when I forget what I was going to do in
the time it takes me to move my mouse and click on the IE
button.
<Soundwave> same
<NapkinEater> if I was home, I'd just settle for google'ing "
<ACTRESS NAME> nude"
<NapkinEater> work sucks
#36602 [ + | - ] 157
<Lilmuckers> ever had a wank in school where it hits the
blackboard?
<ibor132> i hate those
#36599 [ + | - ] 236
<Abbadaba> Client just came and filled out our forms before
her appointment.
<Abbadaba> Was looking them over to make sure she filled in
everything properly.
<Abbadaba> Reason for visit: "I think I'm going nuts."
<Abbadaba> Occupation: "Postal Service."
#36594 [ + | - ] 80
(TheOne) I wanna help at #nohacks
(@Matt) take the test, answer one question and you can get in
(@Matt) echo the time in red
(TheOne) .//echo -a $chr(3) $+ 4 $time
(TheOne) omg, so hard, i had to look at the help files </sarc>
(@Matt) its wrong
(TheOne) i think you will find its right
(@Matt) NO .. I R LEET SCRIPTER NOOB .. I WOULD KNOW
(@Matt) -noob
#36591 [ + | - ] 18
<CrdStang> the only good thing the french ever did was two
chicks at one time
<pagan> true dat CrdStang
#36589 [ + | - ] 676
<monoxyde`> damn, irc is full of idiots
<toothpik> whos irc?
#36588 [ + | - ] 332
<Boogaleeboo> You can't rape inanimate objects
<Boogaleeboo> like I can't go "I'm fucking rapping this water
bottle!"
<Boogaleeboo> Or "Mmmmm, you fucking bitch you don't want my
cock, do you sports radio?"
<Boogaleeboo> Doesn't work
#36587 [ + | - ] 150
[@agg]: fs
[@agg]: i was trying to turn on my stereo
[@agg]: for about 5 mins
[@agg]: with my tv remote
#36584 [ + | - ] 31
<RexExitium> "I miss you, Luke."
<RexExitium> "I miss you too, Amidala."
<Tenek> luke?
<LordChaos-AFK> lol
<Relnereth> Luke and amidala?
<RexExitium> "I love you very much, Amidala. I cannot live
without you. Not one second. Not one second."
<Tenek> Anakin, Rex.
<Sir_silver> HOO HA
<Relnereth> incest!!
<RexExitium> "I feel the same way about you, Anakin."
<RexExitium> haha oops.
#36582 [ + | - ] 20
<NuttO> I feel bad whenever I run a search on my nick.
<NuttO> The fact that I feel bad that I'm not on a database of
IRC quotes makes me feel worse.
<NuttO> It's a downward spiral.
#36578 [ + | - ] 473
<bb> Don't spend two dollars to dry clean a shirt. Donate it
to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on
a hanger. Next morning buy it back for seventy-five cents.
#36576 [ + | - ] 58
<x-spirit> in an hour or so I am going offline for the evening
<T_B2k> k :(
<x-spirit> why that sad mouth mate ! =)
<T_B2k> because he's just had surgical facelifts & it's not
currently physically possible for him to smile :( (That was a
smile)
#36570 [ + | - ] 17
<KaMiKrAe-Z> hahah you zoomed in on a babies nads
#36567 [ + | - ] 1362
*** KronicD (KronicD@vw-2677.bigpond.com) Quit (Exit:
Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there
are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's
either my mum or my dad......or maybe my older brother john.
Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I'm pretty sure it's
john.)
#36563 [ + | - ] 144
<RichiH> warthawg: define "date"
<RichiH> relatives dount count, btw
<warthawg> hmmm define a date
<warthawg> "a social event with a member of the attractive
gender"  no close relatives accepted, however second cousins
approved after dna sampling
<RichiH> heh
<RichiH> warthawg: so.. what gender IS attractive?
#36560 [ + | - ] 546
<Toad> I remember my brother's 21st. It was in a university
hall and all I remember was eating a lot of asparagus.
<Toad> And speeches about people with briefcases.
<Chris_A> Toad, I think that was possibly a board meeting.
<Toad> It might've been!
<Chris_A> Did you come out with a slice of cake, or documents
detailing the fiscal productivity of the 1998 year-end?
<Toad> This joke is now stale.
<NapkinEater> like the cake
<Chris_A> Like the c-- bugger.
<NuttO> Was the cake stale-- FUCK.
<Chris_A> There are no original quips left in this universe,
we must recolonise immediately.
#36557 [ + | - ] 215
<ljlane> I need to do a non-greedy scan on a few gigs of data
for a pattern containing hex and some text. Ideas?
<RichiH> ljlane: suicide?
#36554 [ + | - ] 28
<smarti> hi
<smarti> im 18m from sydney
<smarti> australia
<smarti> any one to chat
<smarti> msg me
<Beerman> as opposed to sydney new zealand
#36551 [ + | - ] 96
<deathz0r> i was setting up opengl drivers
<deathz0r> and it took me 2 days to get them working
<QuiKsiLvA> kool
<QuiKsiLvA> what does it do?
<deathz0r> ...
<QuiKsiLvA> is that were ppl d/l stuff of u or what
<QuiKsiLvA> tell me!
#36549 [ + | - ] 693
<@Porn-Star> do u reckon really geeky Klingons learn english?
#36545 [ + | - ] 722
* Upth tries to figure out why his dog smells like fish.
<Charion> do you have a teenage sister?
<Upth> nope
<Charion> ok no idea then
#36543 [ + | - ] 347
<Thermo-nC-> Why do newbies use X in thier names ?
<-=X=-> I'm nota n00b you fucking mofo fucker!
<Thermo-nC-> I rest my case ;E
#36541 [ + | - ] 34
<DiamonDie> dutch people can't be named ben.
<bool> DiamonDie, why not?
<DiamonDie> because they can't!
<bool> they did!
<bool> even a mobile phone company is called Ben
<DiamonDie> so you're a mobile phone, too?
<DiamonDie> it would be quite odd to be a mobile phone. you'd
get fingered all the time.
#36538 [ + | - ] 146
<fizzie> like there was this one day I took three grams of
sugar and few litres of coke and some assorted lego mindstorm
bits and made sense out of them
<DiamonDie> fizzie: i read "and i snorted lego mindstorm bits"
#36536 [ + | - ] 14
<fadingboy> hmm, it just happened to come on the radio here
that actress Cameron Diaz just gave up pork, having heard that
a pig has the mental capacity of a three year old kid
<BlinkingBear[dishes]> cameron diaz has the mental capacity of
a three year old
<flawd_> are you saying she's a pig BB?
#36530 [ + | - ] 32
<The-Dude> I heard it involves placing a toilet paper tube up
there and letting a hampster crawl in....then pull out the
tube, leaving the hampster in there......
<Kanush> that is disgusting.......yet intriguining "
#36528 [ + | - ] 195
<Karyon> [12:10] * Quits: RainyDay (Will you remember my ass
or my brain? :))
<Karyon> WELL THEY BOTH GOT A LARGE HOLE IN THEM, AND ARE BOTH
FULL OF SHIT!!!!!!!!
#36523 [ + | - ] 8
* Topic is '#studio64: Sex. Angst. Hate. Idiocy.
Socio-theological Debate. || <Sigma> topic change please ||
<Sigma> I'm a big homo.  <Sigma> Please stick something large
and meaty in my poophole. || <Sigma> Thanks'
#36522 [ + | - ] 266
<Diablo-D3> I think I will go to bed
<Diablo-D3> Nothing else to do anymore but sleep
<Diablo-D3> besides working on software
* Diablo-D3 hates working on software, anyhow
* Diablo-D3 sighs
(---about 10 minutes pause---)
<Diablo-D3> yay, everyone ignores me
<RichiH> you are sleeping
<RichiH> you don't exist any more
<RichiH> you just dream that you are in front of your box and
irc
<RichiH> in truth you are being raped by giant snails
#36518 [ + | - ] 413
<qtpielucy2002> what country do ducth people live
<udderbalm> dutchovia.
<qtpielucy2002> really?
#36517 [ + | - ] 325
<road_over> some one is hacking me
<road_over> help
<@InvadeR> hacking you how..
<road_over> the lights on my modem are always flashing
<road_over> is this normal?
#36516 [ + | - ] 220
< dev> it's getting so bash.org is better to read than irc
#36514 [ + | - ] 658
<dOink> brb gotta drop the kids off at the pool
<dOink> i mean... i gotta shit
dOink (dOink@vw27711.pacific.net.au) is now known as dOi[fOOd]
<logicalentity> wtf?!
<logicalentity> food?!
<logicalentity> I thought...
* logicalentity runs away screaming
#36508 [ + | - ] 148
<MaDCoW> verdana is the best font ever
<Threeboy> its allright.
<Threeboy> for a web font.
<MaDCoW> well yea
<Threeboy> when it gets big it gets ugly.
<Threeboy> like a woman.
#36507 [ + | - ] 976
<slackor> maybe, send me your pic first. last person i met off
the net turned out to be 12 FBI agents
#36505 [ + | - ] 288
<reb> im gonna go eat some cocks
<reb> i mean foood
<reb> SHIT
#36504 [ + | - ] 225
<MrFalcon> wtf is ePlus?
<drwiii> your grade in sex ed.