hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21105 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#46646 [ + | - ] 141
<Kobe> http://www.meet-an-inmate.com/ :: for all ur sex0ring
n33ds
<TMBomber> ow wheres the search by crime? u don't even get to
know what they are in for :P
#46643 [ + | - ] 111
<Mazlem> was it on a gravestone?
<cranky> I've always avoided sex after funerals
<l0g1c> nah, it was in her room.
<cranky> generally the bodies are too cold by then
<TxcPoison> thats what microwaves are for
<l0g1c> hah, beat me to it.
<TxcPoison> wow
<l0g1c> just warm the important part up.
#46640 [ + | - ] 89
<Udeth> i fucking HATE counterstrike-players
<Udeth> i hope they all die.
<Udeth> irl
#46637 [ + | - ] 242
<SLURPee> i remember in yr 9 i questioned something
<SLURPee> ohh about genesis and the order in which it occured
<SLURPee> her response was
<SLURPee> 'as catholics we don't question. we just accept'
#46635 [ + | - ] 400
<-- Matias has quit (Exit: Some people are like Slinkies . . .
not really good for anything, but you still can't help but
smile when you see one tumble down the stairs)
#46634 [ + | - ] 232
<Kobe> I just got an sms before.... " This message cost 22
cents. This could feed a muslim boy in afganistan for a whole
day. Send this to 7 of your friends and starve the c**t for a
week "
#46632 [ + | - ] 233
<flook> bugger, I accidentally printed a page of all black and
now I have no ink left :-/
<Steve_Cajun> flook> practising your goth poetry then? :)
#46630 [ + | - ] 207
<_Godless_> what can say to the ex that killed a part of you
that you'll never get back ... with out souding bitter?
#46621 [ + | - ] 431
<|MonK|> I have a 16X dvd rom drive,  so why dose it still
take an hour and  a half to watch a whole DVD?
#46619 [ + | - ] 283
<cin> i have friends in my bum
<cin> My mum says they're worms
<cin> But I know better
#46611 [ + | - ] -12
* Anaconda doesnt feel to well :\
< josie> whyyyy?
<@Anaconda> stomach virus going around down here atm
<@Anaconda> think if got it
<@Anaconda> was painting the toilet bowl last night.. if u get
what I mean
#46610 [ + | - ] 25
(&) rak (rak@vw-7462.idx.com.au) is trying to send you
Gayness.exe(20 kb) on port 3283.
#46608 [ + | - ] -15
<AlBo^StUd> eyyyyyy
<AlBo^StUd> i have a virus i fink
<AlBo^StUd> like wen im on the net
<AlBo^StUd> my mouse goes nuts
<AlBo^StUd> n cliks everywere
<AlBo^StUd> n wen i move it it makes it worse
<AlBo^StUd> d only way i kan get it off is by d/c my mouse n
reconecting it
<My`Albanian`Ass> u running windows 98?
#46598 [ + | - ] 922
<Guest17888> its me Where can i mk trilogy doiwnload???
<Garret> http://www.firstgov.gov/fgsearch/index.jsp?
dom0=www.fbi.gov&mw0=
warez+sodomy+porn+microsoft+illegal+
MORTAL+KOMBAT+TRILOGY+DOWNLOAD+FREE&rn=218&in0=domain
&
parsed=true&Submit=Go&domain=fbi.gov
<Garret> Just go here.
<Guest17888> garret its true or false
<Garret> It's true.
<Garret> I'm getting it at 400KB/s!
<Guest17888> garret its not true
<Garret> You clicked the link?
<Guest17888> yes garret and.....
<Garret> You do realize you just searched fbi.gov for warez,
porn, sodomy, illegal, microsoft, and mortal kombat right?
<Guest17888> fuck ya all
* Quits: Guest17888 (MKIRCN-003@212.182.122.Kg9=) (QUIT: User
exited)
#46593 [ + | - ] 370
<kmad> ppl should stop using worn-out cliches because they're
not funny anymore
<}}T-DuB--> is that your final answer?
#46589 [ + | - ] 20
<Killrbyte> I hate faggots.  They stole our word.
<Killrbyte> Gay used to mean you were happy.  Now it means you
have a sore ass.
#46581 [ + | - ] 220
ComNerd1: would you have sex with anybody?
Auto response from KarpenkoSoup: No women, no kids
ComNerd1: oh, ok
KarpenkoSoup: Yeah, those are the rules.
#46565 [ + | - ] 195
<Scott> i dunno, Bill Gates porn would get sooo many hits
<Scott> they'd wanna see how micro and soft he really is
#46559 [ + | - ] 611
*** Ugly_Stick is now known as Bueghty_Stick
*** Bueghty_Stick is now known as Buehty_Stick
*** Buehty_Stick is now known as Buhty_Stick
*** Buhty_Stick is now known as Beuhty_Stick
*** Beuhty_Stick is now known as Beugty_Stick
<Beugty_Stick> how the hell do you spell beughty!
#46552 [ + | - ] 108
<Wheeze> "yo baby...we all urinate...wanna do it?"
<BIGmog|site> wanna urinate?!  that's your pick up line?
<BIGmog|site> you need to put something in between then
<BIGmog|site> otherwise you're gonna get pee'd on
#46550 [ + | - ] 1376
<BlazeHedgehog> Cripes. ANYTHING is innuendo nowadays
<BlazeHedgehog> "I had a glass of milk." "WHOA GOOD JOB, HOW
WAS SHE?"
<BlazeHedgehog> "No. I mean, I poured milk into a glass and
drank it." "You sure did!"
#46541 [ + | - ] 793
* Sep mst find a working free ISP for gods sack
<BlazeHedgehogAdvance> God's Sack? Isn't that..
<BlazeHedgehogAdvance> Sack-religious?
#46526 [ + | - ] 40
<MistaED|CrazyTaxi> ARGHH
<MistaED|CrazyTaxi> Crazy_Taxi.Deviance.ShareReactor.bin.exe,
it doesn't bloody work
<[whee]Kris|bah> .......you don't run the file, ed
#46517 [ + | - ] 330
<+The_Steel> I scored a 96% on the procrastination test
<+The_Steel> I'm not suprised
<+emul8or_> i put off the procrastination test till tomorrow
#46504 [ + | - ] 399
<Grumman> man, tough week for my fantasy hockey team
<JustNoodle> any luck with your fantasy sex life?
#46498 [ + | - ] 176
<World_Corrupt> I once knew this guy who was 45 and we were
good friends. and i was 11 then
<ascian> you didn't meet him in a bathroom, did you?
#46496 [ + | - ] 356
<nirosys> whoever decided it'd be a good idea to rar an iso
up, then throw it in a tar... then gzip it...
<nirosys> should be shot..
#46485 [ + | - ] 13
<Tibor-> grr. . .I don't have adobe, though, and I don't know
what the hell "vector" is, nor does it outline the process of
"converting" it :(
<Darth-Phenom> Tib, by Adobe do you mean Photoshop?
<Tibor-> Yea, probably, Phen. It just says Adobe Illustrator
and such
#46475 [ + | - ] 126
<fahd> stop making fun of my religion.  islam isn't funyn,
it's serious
<fahd> now shutup, i have to study for calculus
<Hat> Fahd, is Allah good at calculus?
<fahd> >:(
<Hat> Yeah, I guess not.  He's only good at bomb mak.... I
mean chemistry.
#46472 [ + | - ] 182
<magusXXX> I think it's funny that roxio wants to buy napster.
<magusXXX> "You steal it, we'll burn it!"
#46471 [ + | - ] 552
<stern_7> on CNN, story number 1: North Korea has a nuke.
<stern_7> story number 2: Does standing on your head cure
hiccuphs?
<stern_7> This is what happens when AOL is allowed to own the
news.
#46461 [ + | - ] 19
<miv>   http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/finalmeals.htm
<miv>   final meals of people who are on death row
<miv>   "Justice, Equality, World Peace"
<miv>   what kind of request is that
<miv>   U CANT EAT THAT! moron
<miv>   if it was me i would have asked for a 6 year old
japanese girl
<miv>   i'd eat her out
#46449 [ + | - ] 110
<generic> but ive decided to switch this lappy to mandrake
instead of linux
#46445 [ + | - ] 328
* DocHopper is now known as DocRestarting
<DocRestarting> brb
* DocRestarting has quit IRC (Quit: )
<Sean> that was so pointless
#46431 [ + | - ] 149
* Admiral_Justin shoves vex into /dev/null
* Vex Quit (Connection reset by peer)
#46427 [ + | - ] 439
<crushdmb> blah
<crushdmb> I HATE EXES
* crushdmb kills all exes
<vap0r> hahaah
<vap0r> why?
<crushdmb> 'cuz my ex is an asshole
<vap0r> i thought you meant .exe
#46424 [ + | - ] 257
<ef~ian_> I saw a hot chick working at Radio Shack once.  I
think it was a mistake.
#46421 [ + | - ] 661
<gbp> er det noen som har Silence Of The Lambs
<dortch> i have silence of the lambs
<dortch> but i dont know what the fuck you just said
#46420 [ + | - ] 280
<Angelz> cya bskfdhdt
<Hoopy> can I buy a vowel? :/
#46411 [ + | - ] 46
<Guyp> like a week ago this indian
<Guyp> interviewed my english teacher
<Guyp> and he didnt know english
<Guyp> so he said
<Guyp> excuse me, my english bad, because class is boring and
when teacher are teaching i smoke out class
<Guyp> it was so funny
<Guyp> ;[
#46396 [ + | - ] 396
«+ aisu_kurimu » damn right
«+ aisu_kurimu » wait i think i messed up my ghetto lang
«+ aisu_kurimu » damn straight*
«+ aisu_kurimu » ughhhh 17 years in the ghetto, you'd think
i'd pick up something
«@Xellos-san» yeah, herpes
#46391 [ + | - ] 229
<Eticam> omg
<Eticam> there's a hole in my pants, right at my asshole
<Eticam> how the hell did that get there? :/
#46386 [ + | - ] 395
<FeSTeR> oh ya great job pullin out of the parking lot
today..lol almost hit a woman
<GABAR> dude if i was any good at pulling out, you wouldnt be
alive
#46375 [ + | - ] 153
<flawed> they got a weight loss patch now
<flawed> if you're a sexually active fat chick who also
smokes, you could be wearing three patches.. one for weight
loss, one for birth control and one for quitting smoking
<NuFrost> patent the multipatch(tm)
#46347 [ + | - ] 359
(+_Penguin) ican typw qirh my wywa ckoswd
#46338 [ + | - ] 335
<Kai-jin> violence is always an answer
<Aan|trigu> ah..no
<Aan|trigu> :P
<Kai-jin> yes it is..it may not the *the* answer...but it is
always *an* answer
<Aan|trigu> well so is bestiality
#46327 [ + | - ] 191
<Diablo-D3> RichiH: only you would have a chainsaw strapon.
<RichiH> yeah, this completely redefines "treehugger"
#46324 [ + | - ] 633
<w|zzy> had to help sister in the shower
<w|zzy> fuck
<w|zzy> as in she couldn't get it hot enouguh
#46316 [ + | - ] 220
<ryda> earlier, i was lookin up doom 3 stuff
<ryda> and i clicked on this doom 3 screenshot link
<ryda> and it redirected to a pornsite
<ryda> and then my mum comes up to me and offers me a pringle
<ryda> and im just like sheeet
<milenko> ahhahaha
<milenko what did she say?
<ryda> i couldnt get it off the screen
<ryda> she pretended not to noticed
<ryda> alt f4 wasnt workin lol
<ryda> thing is, it looked really really gross
<milenko> what was it, cumshot?
<ryda> im not sure
<ryda> but i think it could have been tranny
<milenko> dude, YOUR FUCKED
#46315 [ + | - ] 30
<@chucky> . <= a map of the world zoomed out alot
<@Diesi|> ha-ha