<Naudiz> my IQ is high enough that I can do anything I want <Naudiz> college means nothing <netbsd_> What is this almighty IQ you have and what self-scoring IQ test gave you the idea you have it? <Naudiz> I'm a Mensa member .. I allready mentioned this. <netbsd_> So you're in the top two percent of the population? <netbsd_> This is me being impressed. <Naudiz> no actually ... only 1 in 50 people qualify to be in Mensa
<ruffkin2> HAHAHAH dat dude you sent me 127.0.0.1 iz enfected wit sub7 im fuckin with him now <andrw> oh good, format his computer <Testicular_One> format his computer <TheGreaterZero> format him
<Fluidmist> so, who wants to come to mexico with me? <technophobe> i would, but i dont speak mexican <Fluidmist> i thought you spoke spanish. <techophobe> i do, i dont speak mexican though <Fluidmist> are you serious? <technophobe> what? yes <Fluidmist> who wants to be the one to explain this to him?
<@rs> i just told someone to not hide the ichat-av vu meter under another window as it would muffle his voice
<Caspian777> Once I get my picture on the net, you'll see. :P <Suvorov> ooh can i have your picture? <Suvorov> no baby ones though - i can't masturbate to those
<fintler> I'm 14176 lines of java closer to getting about $2000 <DocGonzo> maybe you can overcome the stigma that most java apps are gay <fintler> once you ignore the stigma....it's kinda addictive <DocGonzo> you mean like bumlove?
<Amish> why are people fascinated with cartoon porn <Amish> I mean, do you watch the Simpsons and really feel the need to (poorly) photoshop lisa giving bart head? <Gudrow> when hitler was an artist he specialized in tentacle rape portaiture <Mr_X> Gudrow: That's how the alliance between Germany and Japan began <jre> That, and the German-Japanese scat fetish <Mr_X> The scat fetish is the result of secret WW2 nazi experiments <Mr_X> "HANZ, I SHALL NOW DEFECATE IN YOUR MOUTH, JA?" "JA" "DO YOU FEEL LIKE AN UBERSOLDAT YET?"
<Kilroy> gods, I'm dating myself again <MPG> at least you only have to get one person drunk to have sex.
<Murphy01> If i cloned myself, changed the y chromosome to an x chromosome, and then had sex with her, would it be masturbation, or incest? <DS> how about fucking nasty? <Murphy01> Well, that too.
<Bungie> You know porn has become an addiction when you are standing at the gas pump filling your bike and just before you top it off, you pull the hose out and spray it all over the tank.
<prae> my sister is so goddamn retarded <prae> she called mom cause she gave blood today and mom told her to drink alot of fluids <prae> so she drank beer <prae> what a fucking moron
·Jocelyn32· I would like to chat with single a English girl, SMART and slim (even if its scarce). Those who are STUPIDS, have several children from different fathers and/or don't work, please don't come to see me I AM NOT INTEREST IN YOU. Me I have a good look, gentle and funny ·Jocelyn32· In brief... ·Jocelyn32· I m searching for an English girl who sucks, swallows, says thank you and then takes a taxi
<[-FcG-]Poet> lucifer is so 20th century, the devil should rename himself something like 1337Kill@r
<FluKex> isnt cheddar house for the alternative sexual preference people? <crib> FluKex you mean fags? <FluKex> crib my term is less.. umm, bah, ya, its for fags
(monkeh^): this girl from the us was emailing me saying her tummy hurts, out of curiosity i ask why its hurting (monkeh^): i got the reply today (monkeh^): and ill say this; she should have lied
<aO-> ugh <aO-> almost had a brown out <aO-> and im gone * Quits: aO- (~aO@ip68-14-10-213.ri.ri.cox.net) (Client Quit) <ecoli> sounds like someone had Taco Bell for lunch
Fairytalehero: ok, so someitmes me and kel shower together Fairytalehero: and i'll have to pee. so i go "hey kel, look at this" or something, and start PEEING ON HER Fairytalehero: she gets so mad and tries to block it Fairytalehero: but i'm like HAHA I'M PEEING ON YOUR HAND
<remix> i was gonna come back and say "fuck the children" but i realized that it wouldnt sound too good <ecoli> yeah <melly> ic <mkart64> yeah then you go to jail <ecoli> besides, some of us are way ahead of you :D
<axiom-> mike myers is fuckin canadian <axiom-> he'd outsmart those two nitwit killers anyday <starrie> the guy from halloween <starrie> not austin powers <starrie> ninny. <axiom-> oh.
<BoneCollector> well americanisation is quite big in SA <BoneCollector> all the youngsters hear want to be like the Americans, especially with the black kids <mog> that's funny <mog> all the white kids here want to be africans <mog> who would have thought
<exo> a/s/l? <exo> i have blonde hair and blue eyes <exo> i like to run and play with my dog <torechednodle> i like long walks on the beach and men who arent afraid to cry <exo> can i approach you torechednodle <torechednodle> omg cybersex? <torechednodle> yes, but please turn on your landing lights and adjust ILS for approach to vector 160 <exo> there is a dead animal on the runway <torechednodle> yes dont mind that i was shaving
<ClothHat> Isn't Canadian currency made out of tree bark or something? <Cidolfas> CH: Isn't American currency made out of the skins of natives? <ClothHat> That and broken treaties.
<@ecoli> i should just ln -s /dev/urandom ircd.conf <@ecoli> and keep restarting it <@ecoli> eventually it'll get everything right <@Wink> lol <@ecoli> stupid ssl. <@ecoli> this couldn't be less documented if it were an md5 encrypted haiku.
<Afghani> hi <Afghani> h r u? <zebra> what the hell kind of language is that? <zebra> are you fucking fingerly impaired or something?
<exo> why are redneck murders so hard to solve <exo> cuz theres no dental records and all their DNA is the same <fearz> HAHAHA
(@Ti-chan) Bukkake is when a Mommy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy all decide that Mommy needs some special facial moisturiser
<Midnight_Puppy> It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors
<Mewten> video games are now making us nerds do things we would never do in other situations: Dance (DDR), Play an instrument (Samba de Amigo), and now, GO OUTSIDE. Pretty soon we'll be like normal people
<dirtYbird> I am looking for a ecommerce package or someone to make one up, mulitlingual etc. Found one in Jamaica but I find it hard to take anything from there too serious, I can picture them sitting back in front of their PC's with joints the size of rolled newspapers on the phone telling me "it'll be coool mon"
<alobodig-2> Spraying a can of Dust-Off directly into my navel was just about the worst idea I've ever had.
<predetah> i seen a real hackers movie once, but i couldnt stand ot watch it all.. those geeks were so ugly <predetah> this zerocool charactor aint to easy to look at it either
<kohupiimakook> how can u connect two computers <kohupiimakook> like lan, but without ethernet card <suksu> with glue maybe
<Joey> holy nutsac in a tree <LookOutForTheWam> How do you think it got up there? <Joey> it's holy <LookOutForTheWam> Someone castrated god?
<Md0za> HI MEN <MadHattr> Men is plural, I'm singular <Md0za> >: <Md0za> u have botnet? <MadHattr> no. <Md0za> <: <Md0za> i have botnet <Md0za> u want flood? <MadHattr> I know your IP and I work for your ISP. Want internet disconnect? <Md0za> no <Md0za> <: <Md0za> u heck? <MadHattr> no <Md0za> < <Md0za> <: <Md0za> i am hack <Md0za> heck <Md0za> i am 14 yers old <MadHattr> I've noticed
<ChanServ> [|Wolf|] <|Wolf|> maybe you didn't notice my SARCASM <m|p|Leo`xp> yo <m|p|Leo`xp> anybody in here? * |Wolf| is now known as No <m|p|Leo`xp> ;-/ <m|p|Leo`xp> wolf <m|p|Leo`xp> do u know if any1 is taking site requests? <No> this nickname should answer all your questions <m|p|Leo`xp> o roger that <m|p|Leo`xp> do u know when faction will be back? <No> ... * No points to his nickname <m|p|Leo`xp> k
<sherlock_holmes|eating> heh, so i an anatomoy paper due yesterday, and when i was babysitting last week i asked if they wouldn't mind if i usede their comp <sherlock_holmes|eating> the dad said yea, so i asked if he had a filter for adult material turned on. he got a suspicious look in his eye and i told him that filters also block out non-pr0n related material, and since i'm doing an anatomy paper, it'd block out words that anatomy sites use, like penis or vagina <sherlock_holmes|eating> he said he'd turn it off on the condition that i would promise not to use it for pr0n and i said 'nah, i took care of that before i came over' and we both kind of chuckled <sherlock_holmes|eating> needless to say his wife was saying good-bye to the kid in the next room and they could hear me and not 10 minutes later i'm at home just wondering why my timid masturbation joke did more damage to that kids inner psyche than his mom calling me a filthy bastard who should rot in hell right in front of the little guy in that high annoying voice that women get... <ssj_gotensama> lol, you were gonna use it for wankin weren't ya <sherlock_holmes|eating> no that's the thing, i wasn't... i brought over anal invaders 2 for when the kid went to sleep, you can track web surfing history, you can't track what videos you put in the vcr <ssj_gotensama> well i guess the worst part is your out of an 8 buck an hour job <sherlock_holmes|eating> no the worst part is i left my anatomy book over at their place and i don't have the balls to go over and ask for it =(
(Axis): oh shit, i set a timer and now i can't turn it off (Axis): how the hell do you turn it off (@Zaphod): type /timers (@Zaphod): you will be told the timer number (@Zaphod): like * Timer 2 /do something (@Zaphod): then type /timer2 off (@Zaphod): notice, no space after timer (Axis): okay but it's still beepinng (Axis): it says there is no active timers (@Zaphod): Ahh, you didnt type / beep <number> did you ? (Axis): but IT'S STILL BEEPING! AAAAGH! (Axis): yeah, i did (Axis): is that bad (@Zaphod): what was the number you typed? (Axis): 39482034 i think, something like that (@Zaphod): lol - it aint stopping till it beeps that many times (Axis): well shit
<Valqorez> I heard a strange commercial on the radio at work today.... <Valqorez> "Treat yourself to a facial and raise money for charity at the same time." <Valqorez> I was like "What is this, a sponsored bukkake?" <Foz> hahaha <Valqorez> My manager gave me a long, funny look. <Foz> lol. I didn't think many people knew that word <Valqorez> Maybe she speaks Japanese.... <Valqorez> Odd thing was, all I could do was shrug and and say "What?" <Foz> I know that look
<MB|Linux> so Python is a good language to start out with? <Mike|Linux> heh sure <Mike|Linux> That's what I am doing right now.. Or breaking another part of linux. ;) <MB|Linux> I rememeber the old Tandy/Commodore basic :) <MB|Linux> lol <MB|Linux> Cool <MB|Linux> 10 do this <MB|Linux> 20 do that <MB|Linux> 30 do this again <MB|Linux> 40 run <MB|Linux> 50 go fuck yourself <MB|Linux> lol <MB|Linux> 60 go get some food, this will take awhile. <MB|Linux> Hmmm
<realmockturtle> i need to get <realmockturtle> my nipples eyebrow and tonuge pierced <realmockturtle> because apparently <realmockturtle> that goes over well <realmockturtle> oh yeah <realmockturtle> not being a fatass would help too <realmockturtle> but i can't solve that with a needle and a hoop
<pLADASK> since people do not care about my alcohol-problems, im sure johnny cash is off topic as well
<s_> my brother put signs up where the bathrooms are <s_> because i pissed in the hallway last night
<Mephistol> irn and I have a proposal for you <Invizigo> really? <Mephistol> yes <Invizigo> tell me <Mephistol> its along the lines of 'wnt 2 cibur'
<ConqSoft> I don't like tan lines myself. <ConqSoft> I can find all the good parts of a woman on my own, without the help of color-coding.
<Nermal> the only way I could secure windows was by putting bars over my monitor
<aleisha_van> all of the puppets in the thunderbirds look vaguely like ernest borgnine. even the women. it's unnerving.
<Ab0mination> I sleep on a bunk bed yeah, which is only accessbile by a ladder and last night I must've been dreaming or something because I woke up screaming about my ladder being taken off my bed so I couldn't get down <Ab0mination> And I dreamt that there was a badger sleeping at the end of the bed <Ab0mination> So in sheer terror I jumped from my bunkbed down onto the floor at 3am. <Ab0mination> I've now got to go to the vet to get my cat checked out because I landed right on him as he was sleeping on my floor and squashed him. (he's a deaf fuckwit) <Ab0mination> My parents and sisters are not speaking to me. <Ab0mination> Because they found me kneeling down beside the limp cat yelling manically at it and waggling my fingers at it like the Borg of Star Trek do. <Ab0mination> Apparently I was screaming: "I am Locutus of Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile".